Weekend benders and other problems when mom leaves town.

Last weekend (the weekend before Mother’s Day) was a fairly bad weekend and I largely have myself to blame. Sure, I could throw all sorts of excuses at you, but in the end, I only need to look in the mirror to see the culprit behind last week’s debacle. You see, my wife was gone on a four day retreat with ladies from our church, so it was a dad weekend with the kids. Normally, those weekends usually go off without a hitch, but not last weekend. When I think back to where things fell apart, it doesn’t take much to see where I went wrong.

Thursday night: After hanging out at the library watching a super cool presentation on the Pacific Crest Trail, I headed to the grocery store with a small list. I ended up buying a few extra items, all of which contributed to my #parentfail weekend. My list included items for make-your-own pizza, while the extras included a mountain or Oreo cookies (we need dessert, right?), chocolate milk and Coke (hey, mom’s gone, and the kids will think I’m cool) and a few other unnecessary, “dad’s cool,” items.

Friday night: First, the only good good move of the weekend, was when I took the kids to the park and let them burn off a bunch of energy before dinner. (That concludes my parenting weekend successes). We fixed dinner (a little late) and then made sure everyone had several dozen Oreos, drank ourselves silly with an endless fountain of Coke and chocolate milk, then stayed up well-past midnight watching movies together.

Saturday morning: The kids were up by 7:30 (we usually help them sleep 9-10 hours a night), and they plopped themselves right back in front of the TV until almost 11. Why? Because it was easier to let them veg out then to have to actually offer good parenting. By 11am it dawned on me that over the previous 16 hours, I had allowed by kids to watch 9 hours of TV (movies, Sponge Bob and more Sponge Bob). I don’t know about your house, but without a doubt, TV consumption increases fights, irritability, eating and general family chaos. And since our kids are used to a couple of hours of TV over a whole weekend, this overdose was beginning to take effect.

Saturday afternoon: By 1pm, I had already refereed several fights, comforted multiple bouts of tears, repeated these phrases a dozen times each: “Please take a deep breath” and “Think before you speak” and “Please, for the love of all things holy, stop farting in the kitchen!” and, “I’m going to sell all three of you on eBay later today.”

I won’t bore you with more details of my epic weekend.

Have you ever had moments like that? You ever a weekend go bad (with kids, with your spouse, with friends, with work or family)? You ever had a whole week, or month, just bite-it because you made a series of bad decisions? We all have, and here are a few lessons I learned after my weekend bender with the kids.

Bad decisions lead to other bad decisions: As I was thinking about this blog post, I was reminded of a Facebook thread I read a while back. A guy I don’t know well, had posted about the end of his week. Apparently the last couple days of work had been awful, and on Friday he blew up, cursed out his boss, and was sent home early. He described the situation on Facebook, and concluded with, “Anyone want to help me forget about this week by meeting me at [x] bar?” Saturday he posted that the weekend was not improving as he woke up with a nasty headache and felt like a “flu” truck had run him over. Sunday he picked up a speeding ticket trying to get back to his house so he could get some decent sleep to start the week off better than the previous one had started/ended.

Think about that progression: Cursed out his boss (bad choice), drank himself silly (bad choice) woke up severely hung over (bad choice) sped home to avoid starting a week poorly (bad choice) and ultimately started Monday much worse off than he ended Friday (which wasn’t great to begin with!). One bad choice -- choosing not to control his temper -- led to a whole series of bad choices, each compounding the situation.

I did the same thing to my kids over the weekend. My wife generally feeds the family pretty healthy meals and we try to avoid sugaring up the kids excessively. Over the years we’ve seen how much diet affects attitude and outlook on life. We also try to limit how much screen time they get because we’ve seen the connection between how much screen time they get, and how much more arguing and fighting happens. I loaded them up with tons of sugar and then let them veg-out for hours.

Getting a mountain of Oreos wasn’t bad in and of itself, but adding the chocolate milk and coke compounded the one decision. Adding in a family movie wasn’t a bad idea by itself, but turning Movie Night into Movie Coma Night really exaggerated the issues we faced the next day. Usually, when we make one intentionally bad decision, we set ourselves up to make many, because bad decisions are like gum on the bottom of your shoe -- they attract all the garbage on which you step.

Solomon said it this way: “As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats their folly” (Proverbs 26:11, NIV).

Bad decisions usually lead to blame: Like politicians, bad decisions like to hang out in groups and blame others. Once bad decisions start piling up in our lives, we usually start blaming others for the situations that result. Traci and I know a family that has a legacy of bad decision making, one that often involves illegal activities. It’s amazing how often we’ll hear this family blame the police or blame their neighbors or blame someone for making their lives so awful. The reality is their daily choices leave them in such a pit of despair and emptiness, they just need someone else to blame so that they don’t have to stop making bad choices.

I’ve seen it in leadership, I’ve seen it in the church and in the workplace, and I’ve seen it glaringly in my own life: when people suffer the consequences of bad decisions, blaming others is an easy way to feel better (at least in the short-term). But since the problem doesn’t ultimately rest with others, blaming does nothing to solve the real problem.

Bad decisions are just one decisions away from dying: No matter how bad the decisions are that we’ve made, it only takes one right choice to start putting an end to they cycle of making bad decisions. Once we own our mistakes, we can start dealing with the consequences (since we’re not blaming others) and start looking for a new way to see and experience life. It’s simple, but not easy!

My friend Tim, from Texas, used to clock in at close to 500 pounds. I didn’t know him back then, but he would be the first to tell you that he was making a lot of bad decisions when it came to his health (and of course, there were a lot of “good reasons” for those choices). Finally, the day came where he made just one choice, and it was a choice that would change his health forever, as he determined 500 pounds wasn’t going to cut it for the quality of life he desired. Not that long ago, Tim posted on Facebook that he had dropped below the 250 pound mark, and he was still going strong.

Bad decisions compound in a hurry, but so do good ones! When we embrace the journey God has given us, and when we own the times we’ve chosen poorly, made it more complicated than it needed to be or we just blew it, then we can get back on track in a hurry. Just like a whole bunch of bad decisions had Tim tipping the scale at 500 lbs, a whole bunch of good ones helped him reclaim his life.

Thankfully, my weekend was saved before Traci got home on Sunday. Saturday afternoon I fed the kids a decent lunch, kicked them outside to enjoy a “warm” northern Michigan day (hey, 50 degrees is practically Summer around here!) and then had them help with dinner later that night. They all had hot showers, we enjoyed the movie National Treasure before bed, and we took some time to thank God for our situation, for Traci’s retreat weekend and, in CJ’s words, “A great day!” Sunday, Traci came home to three kids that were clean, mostly fed and all generally pretty happy. She might submit my name for Dad of the Year, and just between you and me, let’s not ruin the magic.

The point is simple: one good decision on Saturday allowed for more good decisions, which ultimately changed the whole outcome of our weekend. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not promising rainbows and butterflies or health and financial blessing because you make one good decision today, what I am promising is that life is always better after a good choice. Solomon reminds us that it is truly a blessed life to live with wisdom (Proverbs 13:3), to live with good choices, even if your circumstances haven’t changed.

I wish all bad decisions could be remedied in the course of an afternoon. I am thankful, however, that in an afternoon, regardless of the misery I’ve caused myself in the past, I can make a choice that can lead me out of the foolishness I’ve temporarily embraced. What decision do you need to make today, in order to start reversing a bad trend in your life? Maybe you need to make the choice to seek God’s forgiveness or the forgiveness of someone near you. Maybe you need to hire a coach or personal trainer. Maybe you need to seek accountability from a trusted friend. Maybe you just need to publicly declare an intention to move forward. Whatever it is, remember, you’re just one good choice away from starting something great in your life.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

When your son thinks "penal" is a medical term

A few weeks backs, I posted this story on Facebook:

A couple of nights ago, the kids and I were watching America's Funniest Videos, while AJ was finishing up a school project he missed while on our road trip. He needed to define words and then categorize them. (For example, he defined "pulmonary" and then placed it under the "medical" column.) I was watching as his eyes got big, and instead of just asking out loud for the definition of the word (which he had already done several times) he slipped me the paper with a snicker. He said, "I didn't want the girls to hear this one!" The words was "Penal." He was preparing to put the word under "Medical" when I assured him it belonged under "legal." I explained the word to him and then he, Traci and I wept tears of laughter.

I have a suspicion the “penal” story will circulate in our family for years to come. Even as I write this, I’m snickering as I think about AJ’s reaction, and the moment of realization when he understood the meaning of the word. As my friend Taylor said on a follow-up comment, “To be fair, that one is pretty confusing.” Indeed, and that confusion created a good laugh.

Thankfully, the definition for penal can be quickly explained and AJ won’t have to face massive embarrassment in his adult life when reading about some legal proceedings in the newspaper. Even if he did, barring that he became a lawyer with that same misunderstood knowledge, it wouldn’t take much to fix his thinking.

Other confusing concepts can be significantly more detrimental to someone’s life and growth.

Like many of you, Traci and I are on a great journey of faith right now. It’s interesting how some view this step of obedience as blind or reckless. That belief comes from a misunderstanding about how people have defined the word, "faith." Here are a few thoughts about what it means to live by faith.

Faith isn’t blind. Yes, there are times in life where we “step out” of the comfort of the boat and out onto the water, trusting Jesus to take care of us. But even in Matthew 14, where Overboard Ministries has its origins, Peter’s act of obedience to walk on water, wasn’t “blind!” Look at the passage. First, Jesus called him out of the boat, so Peter already had the assurance that Christ was behind this ridiculous expression of his faith. Second, Jesus was on the water where Peter was being asked to travel. In other words, Peter could see that Jesus was already doing what He was asking Peter to do. Third, Jesus’ rebuke of Peter for losing site of the goal (“You of little faith...why did you doubt?”) reminded Peter that when Jesus calls us to something, He empowers us for the task at hand. Faith isn’t blind.

Those same principles are true for our lives. If Jesus is calling you into action (and I believe He is calling all of His children to action, Ephesians 2:10), you have assurance that He is with you, and for you. According to Hebrews 4:15, Jesus knows what our life experience is like -- He lived here on earth, as the Son of God, fully God yet fully man! He knows what this life is about, and understands, experientially, what we’re going through. Finally, Jesus’ rebuke of Peter rings through the ages to you and me. Doubt, fear and anxiety are tools of the enemy to keep us from following the Lord. James 1 tells us, “...you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance...” God wants to stretch our faith to build lasting character.

Faith isn’t blind.

Faith isn’t the absence of knowledge. I have a dear friend who doesn’t know the Lord, and who, on more than one occasion, has accused Christians of using “faith” as a crutch to compensate for their lack of knowledge. He especially believes this at it pertains to science and the origins of the universe. Hebrews 11:3 says, “By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.” My friend would say, “See, faith is your source of understanding because of your [a Christian’s] lack of knowledge!”

I love what the writer of Hebrews is telling us in this verse. “What is seen” -- in this case, he is talking about the created universe -- points us to an invisible Creator. It’s not the absence of knowledge, but the fact that we look around and realize that nothing else in the universe, no atoms, no scientific theory, no natural law, and nothing duplicated in the world around us, can explain the origins of the universe. Each of these theories lacks a common problem -- a “first cause.” The writer of Hebrews says we see the world, we can understand much of what it is, and we know that someone outside of creation had to bring it into being. God is the first cause.

The Psalmist said something very similar in Psalm 19: “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge” (19:1-2). David, the author of Psalm 19, is telling us that creation screams one message clearly, “There is a God that put all of this into motion!” My knowledge of the world, my understanding of the laws of nature and creation actually point me back to God, not away from Him.

Faith isn’t the absence of knowledge, it’s the recognition that knowledge has its roots in truth, and truth is rooted in the Almighty God of creation!

Faith is never static. Ultimately, too many Christians see faith as a “belief in an idea” or something in their heart. That’s half right, but the other half of faith is crucial; faith must be active! James 2:17 says it clearest: “In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” I love how The Message paraphrases this verse: “Isn’t it clear that God-talk without God-acts is outrageous nonsense?”

Faith in God isn’t dead belief, it’s a life-giving conviction that there is a reason, bigger than me, to get up each day. It’s an unshakeable belief that the Almighty Creator God gives life and breath to everyone, and living life for Him is the greatest cause to which we can devote ourselves. It’s a rock-solid foundation for life that allows us to weather any storm, comforted in the knowledge that everything in life occurs for our good and God’s ultimate glory. Faith in God graciously fixes my life path toward an end that God knows, and one which He asks me to actively follow, trusting that what I see and know about Him, is enough to take the next step.

If you’ve been playing it safe in life, living in the safety and apparent comfort of the boat because you have a bad understanding of faith, I hope you will listen to God and follow Him today. He rarely shows us the whole path, but almost always lays out the next step. Will you take the next step with Him? Will you see who God is and what He is doing, and take the next step? Will you seek to understand Him and His work around you, and in that renewed knowledge and understanding, take the next step? Will you put action to your faith, and take the next step?

Traci and I wouldn’t choose to be on any other journey. It’s not always easy, but the growth and challenge we’re experiencing is worth the work. We don’t know exactly where this path will end, but we know the One who leads us, and in faith, we’re following Him. Not blindly. Not foolishly. Not passively.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water.

Dirty words.

It’s not a 4-letter word, but to many, “accountability” is still a dirty word. When I was younger, I think I worried that accountability showed some sort of weakness in my person or character. As I aged, I realized...it did! However, embracing accountability not only exposes my flaws, it also reveals a great strength: humble recognition that I can’t do this life on my own. If I am going to achieve my best, it will happen because of the help and influence of others.

Accountability is huge for my success, and I can confidently say it’s huge for yours, too. Here are a few ways accountability is working in my life:

1. My computer is armed with software to help protect me and my family -- and keep me on track -- while surfing the web. That software reminds me that everything I’m doing on the web needs to be God-honoring.
2. I wear an "Up" health band. Up records my exercise and sleep each day, then posts it online for my wife and friends to see. (If you’re using “Up” by Jawbone, add me to your team. (@joeacast)
3. Now that I’m working more from home, my wife is able to see my work each day. She can see when I’m loafing or when I’m working too much. Just last week she helped me see that I was totally blowing off the kids to finish a couple of encouragement notes to others. How ironic, I’m trying to encourage other people, and neglecting my own children to do it. Hmmmm.
4. This blog has some built-in accountability. When I’ve missed a posting day or two (I usually post on Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays) it’s not uncommon to get a call, text or email form someone wondering if everything is ok. I cringe when I get one of those notes and I don’t have anything going, but the accountability is good and helps me work hard to stay ahead of the game.
5. When I travel, or when my wife travels and leaves me home, I have a couple buddies who call and make sure I’m doing ok. These guys want to see me be successful, and they are eager to help me make sure I’m making the most of my time.
6. I have another couple friends that ask me about my marriage quite frequently. They ask if I’m honoring my commitment to date Traci regularly. Especially during this particularly stressful season of life, they’ve been asking about our marriage and whether or not I’m doing my job to provide for, and take care of, Traci.
7. When I’m working on a book, I set up a small team of people to help me meet my writing goals. They know my schedule and my deadlines, and they pray for me along the way, and ask keep me track.

The reality is that all of us need help in this life, and God has hard-wired us for relationships in order to find that help. From day one, He gave Eve to Adam (and Adam to Eve!) and all throughout Scripture you find the value and power of teamwork, friendship and accountability. So what happens when we don’t have that accountability?

1. We treat people as property, and leave a wake of damaged relationships in our past. People without accountability often have few real friends and use their work as a shield to hide their insecurities or arrogance (or both). It’s hard to maintain good relationships when you live life without the input of others.
2. We fall behind in our work, as no one is around to ask about details, confirm deadlines or even know what we’re working toward. A stay-at-home mom, a CEO, a college student or a Southern California pool boy can become lazy and ineffective, addicted to Netflix or video games, a busybody or micromanager when they live without meaningful input from others.
3. We blame others for our failures, because no one in our lives is giving us the perspective we need. I’ve known too many leaders who operate without solid accountability, and they are professional blamers when it comes to organizational short-comings because it’s easier to blame a subordinate then it is to see yourself as the problem (or at least part of the problem). My lead pastor in Salem, Oregon, set a stellar example of submitting himself to accountability. More than once I saw him listen as a member of the Elder board, or a member of the congregation, confronted or challenged him on something related to his leadership. He was always willing (and eager!) to learn from those moments, and able to admit his own flaws when necessary. Accountability allowed him to see mistakes or shortcoming he maybe couldn’t see himself. That’s a good thing!
4. We put up a front that hides major problems behind. As a pastor in the Pacific NW for almost 17 years, and now having served in Michigan for over two, I’ve seen too many ministries fall apart because a pastor held up a great facade while his marriage or personal purity or financial integrity was in shambles. When no one is asking us the hard questions, it’s too easy for us to hide the trash.
5. We never realize our true God-given potential, because that potential is connected to the relationships God has given us. Leaders fail to get their organizations to their goals, marriages never reach the intimacy either spouse desires, families live in constant tension and people settle for ordinary lives because they neglect accountability.

Do any of those items resonate with you? If so, you might be lacking accountability in some area(s) of your life. Trust me, you can’t live the Overboard Life without the help of others, so the sooner you accept that, the sooner you can begin moving toward the goals, and ultimately toward the life, God has given you.

When I look at this list I know I’ve been guilty of each of these byproducts of living life without accountability. I’m thankful for the men and women who’ve stepped up to help me, for the ones who said yes when I asked, and for the ones who simply invited themselves into my life. In each case, the accountability has helped me live my God-designed life out of the comfort of the boat.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water.

Finally 4!

You probably noticed that we’re starting to wear our big-boy pants. You know, the ones that have a zipper and a button, not just an elastic waistband? Sure, they still have the adjustable stretchy thing on the inside, but all pants should have those, right? We’re also sleeping through the night, using silverware somewhat effectively at most of our meals, we know how to count to 25, can use an iPad better than most 50-year-olds and, honestly, I don’t think we’ve had an accident in almost a year -- we’re sooo past that phase. That’s right, Overboard Ministries just turned four.

Now that we’ve grown up so much, it’s already time for us to get out on our own. Wow, feels like just yesterday we were birthed and now we’re being kicked out...er...overboard. (Feels kinda like Megamind: “8 days old and I’m still living with my parents...how embarrassing.”)

Thank you for following us on this exciting/terrifying, exhilarating/sobering, gargantuan/humbling and faith building journey. As we look back over the past four years, we are truly blown away by what God has done, and by the path He has given us to travel. We started Overboard with the idea of publishing one book (Project Joseph), and building a small ministry of encouragement to couples, pastors and youth pastors, and maybe one day expanding into ministry mentorship/coaching for those going into full-time youth ministry.

Today we’ve published 9 titles, we have 2 more that will be released in the next month, and 6 more that are in the editing process. Today we are building a partnership with Starwood Ranch where we are praying about building the first Overboard Ministry Center, a place to invest in pastors and youth pastors and their wives, as well as marriages and families. Already a team of people are gathering around that endeavor and we’ve been in talks with several others about expanding Overboard Ministries’ reach into other areas and fields. A mentorship program for youth ministry majors is being developed and we’re having conversations with others about some pretty big, out-of-the-boat, concepts.

While we didn’t get to this place the way we intended, we have clearly been directed by God to be in this place at this time. (Check out this post about unexpected stop signs, or this one about God’s plans for our lives). And we know that as we move forward, our partnerships, with friends like you, will continue to grow. You are the people who read the blog, send the encouraging notes, share our crazy ideas, buy our books, offer helpful criticism, and pray with us believing that God is behind all of this.

Thank you.

We are excited to keep moving toward the big dreams God has placed in our hearts, and as we do, we humbly depend on support from an army of great people. If you would like to join our monthly financial support team, please click here. We are well on our way to finding 100 monthly supporters (So far, gifts have ranged from $10-$125/mo, -- the average has been $50. You can join at any level and share in the work of Overboard thru your giving!), and if you’d like to join that team we would be incredibly humbled and eternally grateful.

Likewise, we truly want to build a prayer team that is informed (weekly) and active in their prayer support for this ministry. Click here to be added to that prayer list and to be updated with current requests each week. If you sign up for our financial team, you will automatically be added to our prayer team.

Stay-tuned, God’s work in and thru Overboard is just beginning, and we are grateful to celebrate our 4th year with you.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life -- including birthday parties -- is always better on the water!

What's your pain threshold?

Do you have a high pain threshold? When it comes to physical pain, I must admit, I’m a bit soft. I’m not one of those guys who has visions of himself enduring weeks or months of pain, suffering and hunger on an desolate island after being shipwrecked and left for dead. I’m more like the guy who envisions himself calling on his cell phone for help, waiting about 20 minutes, and then covering himself in bacon grease so the bears will eat him quickly. What about you? Of course, there are many forms of pain, and while my physical pain threshold may not be particularly high, I’m learning live with -- even embrace! -- pain in other areas of life. After all, endurance is a requirement for anyone who wants to live the Overboard Life!

On April 18, 1981, in the New England town of Pawtucket, two baseball teams from the International League began a game at 8:00pm, with no possible knowledge of what was about to transpire. Before the eight hour game was over, every American professional baseball game record for length of game (in hours and innings), for at-bats, for pitches, for walks, strikeouts, put-outs and plate appearances would be broken. Two future hall-of-famers would be present but have no bearing on the final outcome. The game was suspended, at 4:09am, by a phone call from the IL president, and finished, as only baseball can do, two months later on June 23rd (after just 18 minutes of play).

I can’t imagine playing in a baseball game that lasted over eight hours, although I must admit that had I been in attendance, I most likely would have stayed to the end. By most counts, only 19 people (of the original 1,800 in attendance) watched the final at-bat in the bottom of the 32nd inning after the clock struck 4am. Despite the thinning crowd (is 19 a crowd?), the bitter cold wind blowing thru the stadium and the lack of any end in site, both teams played through less-than-stellar early Spring conditions in Rhode Island that night, and finished the marathon baseball game.

While few, if any, understood the significance of the game, years later, they would be grateful for the experience. Pawtucket’s Dave Koza, who had the game-winning hit, would later say, “Nothing I ever do in life will probably compare with this!” And Rochester’s Dallas Williams would later add, “It sank in the next day. Man, we just played 32 innings of baseball. We joked about it. We had smiles on our faces. I was thankful I was a baseball player and on the field that night. As time went by, I appreciated it more.”

The stadium was packed on June 23rd when the two teams met to finish the game. Extra tables were set up for the 150 members of the press who came to see the end of this marathon game. It ended after one inning of play -- just 18 minutes -- and Pawtucket won the game. Koza, the Pawtucket hero, was inundated with fan mail, letters of praise and national recognition for his part in the drama. While he would never play baseball at the Major League level, he will always be remembered for his part in this story. Cal Ripken Jr, one of baseball’s all time great players, and another not-too-shabby infielder named Wade Boggs, would both be enshrined in MLB’s Hall of Fame, and both would be forever connected as players in that marathon game.

But why? Why play baseball for 8 hours? Why endure the cold? Why not just give up and let the other team win? Why not forfeit? Why would an umpire, in attendance with his 9-year-old nephew, keep the game going? Why wouldn’t one of the team managers put an end to this nonsense? In his book, Bottom of the 33rd, Dan Barry suggests this reason: “Because we are bound by duty. Because we aspire to greater things. Because we are loyal. Because, in our own secular way, we are celebrating communion, and resurrection, and possibility.”

I sat on those words for a few minutes, thinking about how they applied to baseball. There is a majesty to baseball, even thought it’s just a game, and there is an honor to its members and history that is different than any other sport. Baseball history binds today’s players to an unwritten duty from the past, and challenges them, through the eras, to do greater than their forefathers. Baseball players tend to be fiercely loyal, and anyone who watches the game knows it is nearly a religion.

As I thought about those words and how they reflected the great American Pastime, I began thinking about how they applied, even more, to life. Why should we endure hardships that stretch our faith? Why should we follow God’s path for our lives, when it’s guaranteed -- 2 Timothy 3:12 -- to have challenges, struggles and trials? Why not quit? Why not give up and take the easy path?

Simply put, to steal from Dan Barry, “Because we are duty bound. Because we aspire to greater things. Because we are loyal. Because, in our own [spiritual] way, we are celebrating communion, and resurrection and possibility.” Think about each of those phrases:

We are duty bound: “For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died” (2 Corinthians 5:14, NIV). We are bound to God in holy duty, because of the sacrifice of Christ. God’s love compels us to keep pressing on!

We aspire to greater things: “God can do anything you know, more than you could ever imagine, guess or request in your wildest dreams...” (Ephesians 3:20, The Message). The possibilities for our lives are endless, not because of who we are, but because of who Christ is!

We are loyal: “But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind, and straining toward what is ahead, I press on to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14, NIV). We press on because of what is in store for us, in this life and the next. We loyally set aside any earthly gain in order to be faithful in Christ!

We are celebrating communion, and resurrection and possibility: “If the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, He who raised Christ from the dead, will also give life to your mortal bodies because of His Spirit who lives in you” (Romans 8:11, NIV). The power that resurrected Christ from the dead is the same power that unites all believers in holy communion, and it is celebrated and remembered in the resurrection of Jesus from the dead, which is the power that removes any barriers from any God-given goal!

Whatever you’re going through, I urge you to press on. Whatever challenges you face, keep moving forward as you follow Christ, out of the comfort of the boat, and out on the water where Jesus is building His Kingdom. The game you’re in might go extra innings, the wind may start blowing cold and the spectators will disappear long before the challenge is finished, but duty, greatness, loyalty and holy communion call you onward. Answer the call, get out of the boat, and see what God will do.

“Play Ball!” and finish the game, no matter how long it takes.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water.

I'm 40 and living in my friends' basement...

...and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Seriously. This morning I was thinking about how crazy life can be. At times, Traci and I feel like we’re the punch line to one of those Nationwide Insurance commercials: “Life comes at you fast.” It’s funny when it happens to MC Hammer, not-so-funny when it happens to you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcXTW14fS2Y

Last week we returned from a 6,500 mile road trip to Oregon, and began the next phase of our Michigan life by moving into the basement of a dear friend. Don’t get me wrong, it might be one of the nicest basements I’ve ever seen. There are four bedrooms (the places sleeps 14!), two full bathrooms, a full kitchen, a nice little dining area and to top it off -- it’s fully furnished including towels, blankets, sheets and all the kitchen utensils for our family. Did I mention we’re on a lake and have a beautiful view from large windows and have walkout access from our private entrance? It’s really a gift.

Back in January, I was struggling to see the gift side of this situation. After all, I’m 40-years-old, I have a wife of 18 years, three amazing kids and I’m at the stage of life where I should be settling into my career. In fact, five months ago, I would have told you that I was settling into a career. I would have told you that I was in a job that I could see staying with through my “golden years.”

Then God turned my life upside down. He removed my job, income, insurance, house and basic comforts and securities. He clearly directed Traci and I to put ourselves full-time into Overboard Ministries and He lined up a partnership with another local ministry (Starwood Ranch) to help make that pursuit a reality.

So, in an instant, we moved from regular full-time income to having to raise our own support. We switched from having the comfort of an on-site house, to living on the kindness of others while we wait 7 months to settle in a new town (August/Sept). For the first time in my life, my insurance isn’t being supplied by my employer, and instead, we’re paying out of pocket for super limited coverage and I’m facing the expenses of an upcoming surgery. The kids will be changing schools again.

And I honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. Seriously.

Over the past few months, as I’ve had time to process the series of events that has put us where we are, I can honestly tell you there’s no other place I would rather be. Sure, I would love to be back in a house, on someone’s payroll and enjoying the peace of mind that comes with quality insurance, but if I had to choose between that and the path we’re on...I hope I’d make the hard decision to hold this course every time! (Of course I’d take both if I could, but right now, God has said those two options aren’t available to us.)

The reality is that this journey has already stretched me further than I thought possible, and I suspect the stretching has just started. Already I’m experiencing a renewed energy and faith in the person and work of God, and I suspect He has some pretty amazing works to show us. Traci and I are enjoying a closeness and intimacy that only comes through facing obstacles together, and the bonding we’ve done with our kids has only served to strengthen their faith and push me to be a better dad.

Although this season has brought deep sorrow, challenging growth and difficult decisions, it has been filled with deeper joy, richly rewarding experiences and life-changing moments of being the recipients of God’s goodness and grace through others. The sorrow, growth and decisions don’t compare to the joy, experiences and goodness and grace of God. Not even close.

I feel a little hint of experiential understanding of Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18:

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (NIV).

The Overboard Life requires an eternal perspective, in the good seasons and in the “bad” ones. When God has provided abundantly beyond our needs, and when it seems that He has given just enough to meet the current circumstances. When we have that eternal perspective, truly we are maturing in our faith and will be ready for whatever God has next.

I’m still maturing, and the season of life we’re in is part of the process of preparing us for a deeper faith and more profound expression of our relationship with God. If being a 40-year-old homeless husband and father is what it takes to experience that, then I’m ready for the journey. Yes, I’m praying for a little more certainty and comfort in the future, but even more, I’m praying I keep becoming who God wants me to be so that I’ll be ready for what He wants me to do.

And that’s why I can honestly tell you, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Seriously.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water.

I wanted to punch a guy...

Last week, Traci and I had the opportunity to take in a Mariner’s game and visit some dear friends while we were on our West Coast tour. We drove up Wednesday (about 4 hours from my family in Salem) and enjoyed a beautiful night, even though the M’s lost, while catching up with Bob and Emily, the first couple to join our youth staff when we worked in Washington. It was a great night.

The next day, we caught up with friends Tal & Joan, and then thanks to a blown appointment (I really felt like April 8th should have been a Thursday...not a Wednesday! Sorry Ritters!) we ended up with a somewhat free afternoon. The sun was shining and it was the first alone time we had experienced in a couple of weeks, so Traci and I took to downtown Seattle on a gloriously sunny day. If you can catch Seattle on warm and sunny day, it truly is one of the great American cities to enjoy.

After hanging around Pike’s Place Market for a couple of hours, we headed back up toward the Space Needle where we would find a pizza shop to eat, and hit the road to catch up with another friend before leaving for Salem. While walking among the crowds who were enjoying the weather like us, we fell in step with a man talking on his cell phone.

I totally started listening to his conversation and saw that Traci was doing the same. After just a few moments, I realized what was happening, and I wanted to intervene. I’m not, nor have I ever been, any kind of fighter or brawler, but something was rising in me that wanted to hurt this man at some level. He was a pimp, and he was preparing one of his girls for her night of work. Here’s what we heard at the end of his call:

“Hey, where are you at?”

[response]

“How much money have you made?”

[response]

“It’s only $150? You’ve gotta do better than that.”

[response]

“So here’s what I want you to do. Go get your son and spend some time with him. I’ll get you a place to rest and I’m going to buy you a coffee...”

[response]

“That’s right, I’m going to buy you a cup of coffee, get you some food, and I want you to rest up before you take more calls for tonight. So just enjoy your son, and then we’ll take more calls tonight.”

Traci is preparing for a trip to Thailand to work with women who are trafficked for sex. As a result she’s been learning a lot about the problem of human trafficking and the reality of its ugly presence in countries like Thailand, and in places like Seattle. The use and abuse of women (and men) for sexual pleasure is vile.

This guy’s call was a textbook call to “his” girl. He was gentle and kind, although very firm ($150 was not enough profit so far) but he was providing her a chance to be with her son, have a place to rest, and even a cup of coffee. In his own sick way, he was taking care of her needs, while coercing her to use her body for his own financial gain and perverse pleasure. The whole thing is sick, yet the cycle is complex and the solutions aren’t simple.

Going to Thailand this summer, my wife will get to experience a rescue work happening in one of the major human trafficking places in the world. This issue is both heart-breaking and sickening, yet there is an army of people rising up to bring true hope and healing around the world, and here in the U.S. I’m sure we both will be sharing more about this topic in the weeks to come.

What ultimately “got me” about the call in Seattle, was the thought that the person on the other line was a woman -- not a thing, not a sex toy, not an item to posses. She isn’t any man’s property, but she is a beautiful person created in the image of God, created to know Him and be known intimately by Him. That she is a prostitute doesn’t change her value as a person (any more than this guy who is pimping her, is somehow less of person). Our actions don’t determine our value to God.

A couple years back I wrote a post about this topic, reminding readers that these women were born as daughters to moms and dads. They were precious little children, perfect in their parents’ eyes, and they entered this world adored. The tragic events and choices that led to their current condition, doesn’t change their true identity. And even if they weren’t loved by an earthly family, they were -- and are -- intimately loved by their Heavenly Father!

No matter where life takes you, or where those you love choose to dwell, the truth of Psalm 139 rings through all of our circumstances and tells us that God loves us deeply, and longs for us to know Him as He knows us:

“I look behind me and you’re there,

    then up ahead and you’re there, too—

    your reassuring presence, coming and going.

This is too much, too wonderful—

    I can’t take it all in! (139:5-6)

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;

    you formed me in my mother’s womb.

I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!

    Body and soul, I am marvelously made!

    I worship in adoration—what a creation!

You know me inside and out,

    you know every bone in my body;

You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,

    how I was sculpted from nothing into something.

Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;

    all the stages of my life were spread out before you,

The days of my life all prepared

    before I’d even lived one day. (139:13-16)

Your thoughts—how rare, how beautiful!

    God, I’ll never comprehend them!

I couldn’t even begin to count them—

    any more than I could count the sand of the sea. (139:17-18) The Message

As my pastor says at the conclusion of every message, “You are dearly loved.” Indeed, you are dearly loved, and I trust today you will know God and His love more, and share it with the world that so desperately needs to hear the message. The woman on the street, her son and even her pimp, need to hear the message of hope that God loves them, He has provided hope and salvation and He answers anyone who calls on His name.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

Road Signs

My family and I just finished up a road trip that took us over 2,800 miles, traveling from Michigan to Oregon. It was a great adventure, and Traci and I, and our three amazing kids, had a lot of fun and made a ton of memories. Good thing, too, because thanks to three of my nephews and nieces getting married this summer, we’ll be repeating that trip in two months!

I have the privilege of guest-posting for a friend. Check out the rest of this week's post on her site, A Wasted Life. While you're there, be sure to check out Hannah's other blogs, I think you'll enjoy what you find!

Regardless...what I learned, when God didn't.

Obviously I enjoy writing a blog, but I also enjoy reading blogs. When I come across one that really hits the mark for me, I love sharing it with you so you can add another one to your reading list. My new friend Hannah has a great blog, and today I've asked her to share with you so you can get a sense of who she is. I hope you'll read it and check out her other works on her site. Enjoy!

"You are invited to join us at for a special Hardship Service. 

Come share your darkest moments and hardest seasons with dozens of strangers.  Do you have a health issue that God hasn't healed? Come tell us about it!  Are you facing eviction because you haven't gotten that raise at work? We'd love to hear about it!  Have you been crying over a broken relationship that God hasn't restored? Come cry with us!" 

You will never see this service advertised on a church website or bulletin. Why? Because people love to talk about the amazing things that God does.

When He heals the sick. When He provides in miraculous ways. When He raises the dead to life.

But most people don't want to talk about times that God doesn't.

I am not one of those people. 

It all started with a blazing furnace and a simple declaration.

You've probably heard the story of crazy King Nebuchadnezzar and the furnace. I like to call him Nezzy for short. The story is found in Daniel chapter 3 and tells of three young men who refused to bow to the idol that Nezzy built of himself.

In a nutshell, they refuse to worship the idol so Nezzy throws them into the blazing furnace. But a miracle occurs and the three friends emerge safely from the flames without even a smell of smoke on their clothing.

This story is pretty unbelievable. But I believe the most unbelievable part comes not in the furnace but at the idol when the friends stand before the king. They say with boldness:

"But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”

Their faith in God gave them the audacity to say, "REGARDLESS of what happens to us, He is our God." Regardless. It means in spite of everything. Despite the prevailing circumstances. In the face of everything that tries to stop or hinder.

Honestly, sometimes it’s really hard to say those words.

In the GOOD times of blessing, provision, and health it's easy to say, "You are my God."

But it’s a different story when things are hard. In the BAD times, when they stay bad, and when God doesn't show up how you expected Him to.

But, I truly believe that if we want to grow into mature Christians we have to learn to praise God when He DOESN'T just as easily as when He DOES.

This was not an easy thing for me to learn.

In college something happened that changed my faith forever. It was a normal Friday night when all of the sudden I got a terrible headache and couldn't even stand. I tried everything to ease the pain but nothing worked. Months went by and I had every test under the sun but the doctors could not figure out what was wrong with me.

My grades slipped. My relationships suffered. My faith in God was shaken.

A year later I was diagnosed with something called NDPH (New Daily Persistent Headaches). The doctor said, "This means that for some reason you suddenly got a headache and you will have them for an undetermined time. There is no cure. Many people have it for the rest of their lives."

As you can imagine, that was not very comforting to me. But I knew that the Bible told me I was healed by Jesus stripes. So I prayed. I asked. I sought. I did everything you’re supposed to do. And you know what happened?

God didn't heal me.

I was so angry with Him because it didn't make sense to me that He could be ABLE to do something and still choose NOT to do it.

Months later, still in pain, I sat down to pray. I couldn't even find the strength to ask him one more time. So instead of praying for healing I simply said, "I love you." They were the only words I could muster.

And in that weak moment, I heard His sweet voice: “Daughter, your faith shouldn't be based on what I do. Whether I heal you or not, I’m still your God."

From that moment on I have been free!

To this day I still have headaches every single day. I don't know if God will ever heal me. And frankly...I really don’t care!

Because REGARDLESS of whether He heals me, blesses me, or gives me anything at all, He is still my God!

Today, you need to know that REGARDLESS of what is going on in your life, He is still GOD!

When we are in the tough times of life we tend to think that it’s God who has somehow changed. But in reality it’s us who decide to change, not God!

Malachi 3:6 God says: “I, the Lord, do not change." Numbers 23:19 says, “God is not human. He does not change his mind.”

God doesn't suddenly change on us. It’s us who change under the weight of our worries, pressures and disappointments.

There are three important lessons I learned when God didn't heal me:

1. DON'T LET YOUR FRUSTRATIONS CHOKE YOUR FAITH

Make a decision right now that you will trust Him REGARDLESS of your frustrations.

My struggle with healing left me so frustrated with God because I knew that He was ABLE to heal me but He chose not to. I started to let my frustrations blind me to who God was. This is a dangerous place to walk.

Maybe you are frustrated with yourself. With God. With others. I understand. But I want to challenge you to have a faith that doesn't hinge on what God does for you or in you, but hinges instead on who He is.

Faith isn't faith unless it is faith even if He doesn't.

2. DON'T LET YOUR WANTS CHANGE YOUR WORSHIP

Make a decision right now to praise Him REGARDLESS of what you get out of it.

We all want things. We want to be blessed. To be healed. To have life go a certain way. There's nothing wrong with having those desires. But the problem comes when we let our wants determine our worship.

We must do what is right, even if God doesn't do what we want or expect.

We often do quite the opposite.

Many Christians tell God that once they get what they want, then they will worship. But we don't worship to receive anything from God. We worship because of who He is.

He is worthy REGARDLESS of what we want!

3. DON'T LET YOUR PROBLEMS STOP YOUR PURSUIT.

Make a decision right now to seek Him REGARDLESS of your problems.

I used my problems as an excuse to stop seeking God. I thought because I was in pain that I got some kind of pass from pursuing His Presence. But I was wrong.

Having problems doesn't change the fact that God is the most worthwhile PURSUIT we will ever have!

REGARDLESS of what is going on in your life, God is still God.

If you ever get misguided in thinking that your hard life exempts you from giving everything to God, let me remind you that not only is He worthy, but He did the same for you.

REGARDLESS of your past. IN SPITE OF all your sin. AGAINST ALL ODDS of having a relationship. IN THE FACE OF EVERY OPPOSITION that tried to stop Him...

He came. He lived. He died. He loved. All for you.

I don't know about you but that is enough for me to say, "REGARDLESS of what is happening in me, to me or around me:

"Oh God, You are my God. Give me nothing  And I will still give you everything."

As you can see, Hannah has a great style, and I've really come to enjoy her blog. It's raw, challenging and she writes with humor and passion. Please take a moment to check out her site, A Wasted Life.

Lessons from the road

Ever since I was a child, I’ve always loved a good ol’ fashioned road trip. I’m sure part of my love comes from doing lots of these trips while growing up, and another part is just because I love driving and being out on the road across this amazing country where we are privileged to live. Whatever the reasons, the fact is: I love road trips. Telling people we were driving from Michigan to Oregon got us some pretty funny responses. Only a few people thought it sounded fun, others expressed horror at the thought, others gave us pity and a few just shook their heads, confident our sanity had left us completely! When we told them we were doing it with the three kids, too, many shared their worst travel experiences, or said in a whiney voice, “Are we there yet?!?” Traci and I had a lot of laughter telling people about our trip. Wait until we tell them we’re doing it again in June!

But I seriously love the open road, and our family travels really well. The kids have learned how to engage each other, as well as how to entertain themselves when necessary. Traci and I enjoy the scenery and talking about life, work, family, sex (when the kids are sleeping =) dreams, Overboard Ministries, USANA, sports, news, politics, God’s amazing creative power as seen from the front window of our van, and lately, a lot about our future. Our road trips generally create great memories and the confined space gives us ample time to work on bonding and to grow in patience and grace.

Road trips are also full of the unexpected, and always provide ample learning opportunities.

Our’s started with a big lesson three and half hours before we left the Traverse City hotel we were enjoying. We were scheduled to leave by noon on Friday, but Thursday night, a loud noise from the car caused us both a great deal of concern. Since my knowledge of cars can be summed up in a sentence (“take it to a mechanic”), I knew I had to take it in before we hit the road.

We have a great mechanic in Traverse City, a fellow Christian who does excellent work with integrity (Kinney’s Automotive), and who happened to be just ten minutes from the hotel. I showed up when the doors opened Friday morning, and got on the schedule for an hour later. Shortly after I returned, one of the techs was taking a look at our van. Turns out the front driver’s side wheel bearings were bad (that accounted for the noise) and just for added fun, the brakes were nearly metal-to-metal and needed to be replaced. I had prayed for a quick, $12 fix with parts already in the shop. Instead I had a three and half hour repair, parts had to be ordered from a nearby shop and we were looking at a $500+ repair. And who doesn’t love road trips?!?

As I was driving back from the shop to the hotel (after I scheduled the appointment but before the tech had given an official diagnosis), I was lamenting the unexpected expense, whining to God about the lost time and was worrying about how the money and time would affect our whole trip. I was deep in worry when God taught me an important lesson.

Just as I was contemplating offering to leave AJ to work in the shop to pay off our bill, I hit a little clearing on the side of the road and guess what I saw? The sun was coming up on the horizon.

Honestly, I was instantly cut to the heart at the site of the sunrise. Maybe that sounds silly to you, but to me, I was reminded that the God who created the universe, the God who “makes the sun rise up in the east” was the same God who cares intimately about me and my life, you and your life, and the lives of every individual on the planet. He is the same God who has provided for our family during this season of transition in ways we could never have planned or imagined, and the same God who was going before us on this trip. As I thought about the sunrise, I felt silly about how caught up in worry I had been just moments before.

I confessed my worry to Him, and returned to the hotel ready to gather the family, load up the van and hit the road. What did God do thru all of this?

1. He helped us discover a super loose wheel bearing pack that would have failed on the road. What happens when they fail? According to a bunch of online testimonies, your wheel can actually fall off! Imagine that happening at 70 mph!
2. We also discovered that our brakes and rotors were in dire need of repair -- another item I’m glad we corrected before barreling down the rockies at 80mph (I love the speed limits in Utah and Idaho!).
3. Before we left town a friend asked to meet us at a local McDs, and he gave us $210 for travel expenses.
4. Despite all the delays, we ended up arriving at our destination at precisely the right time -- to the minute!

It’s crazy how often we get caught up in worry, fear or anxiety when we serve the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. I don’t think I can even count all the times He has shown up big in our lives, or provided a friend, some rest, a meal or a few bucks “at just the right moment” and yet when faced with a minor auto repair, I panicked.

Yet God is so good to us, and Friday morning He cleared the sky so I could see the sun come up (that’s right, all you Northern Michiganders have me and my sinful worry to thank for Friday’s glorious sunrise!) and reminded me of His limitless power and ability to provide.

How are you doing in trusting Him today? Does a worry -- big or small -- have you distracted from what He is doing in and around you? Maybe you need to make Philippians 4:6-7 your prayer today: “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s holiness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life” (The Message).

It’s going to take us three, twelve-hour days, to get to our Oregon destination, and along the way, I’m going to try and keep worry in its rightful place. How about you? Maybe you need to take the family on a road trip and see what God has for you, too!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life -- even road trips! -- are better on the water.

#blessed

Earlier this week, my wife wrote a great blog about the humble blessing of being the recipients of so much kindness from others. (Seriously, it's short, sweet and worth reading!) I think Traci and I have always considered ourselves ridiculously blessed when we think about the friendships God has given us, but lately, that blessing has been almost too much to handle. In Psalm 23, David wrote, “...my cup overflows” in talking about God’s goodness to him. Traci and I can surely relate to the way God has showered us with His kindness, through His people, the last two months.

I have learned a bit about myself during this seasons of blessing. First of all, I’m learning to be a better receiver, but I’ve still got a ways to go. Over the years, God has allowed Traci and I to be on the giving end of His grace and goodness, and we have experienced the joy of the scriptural truth, “It is better to give, than to receive.” During this season of receiving, we have had the joy of allowing others to be the conduit of His grace and goodness. It is humbling, but it is special to see how God meets needs in ways we could never have imagined. Without a doubt, these stories will one day make it into a book, as will the lessons I’m learning!

Not only am I learning to be a better receiver, I’m also learning to embrace God’s plan regardless of how crazy it seems from my limited perspective. As Traci and I have followed the Lord through this wild season of change, His blessings in our lives have followed us along the way! When I first lost my job back in January, we toyed with the idea of just licking our wounds, washing our hands of the problems and packing our things to head back to Oregon. Yesterday, while taking a stress-relieving walk together, Traci and I talked about everything we would have missed out on, had we just packed up and headed west. Truly, following God despite the crazy limited perspective we have, has proven to be spiritually, emotionally, financially and relationally richer than any path we could have made for ourselves.

Finally, I’m learning how rich I am in regards to the way God showers us with His grace and goodness through His children. More than once I’ve shed tears over the gifts that have sustained us through this season of uncertainty. More than once I’ve sat dumbfounded at how an exact need was met, a meal was provided, a gas tank was filled, a debt was paid, a box of goodies arrived in the mail, a helping hand was offered or a special provision showed up just in time. Each time one of those things happened, there was another human on the giving end.

Could God miraculously drop a pot of gold into the back of our van? Yes! (And Lord, just so you know, we’re open to that idea, too!) Instead, He most often chooses to use others to be the conduit of His work. Sometimes anonymously, sometimes with a special card and note, sometimes with a smile, sometimes with a back story that only God could write and sometimes with a hug and a “God told me to do this for you.” Truly, based on the people in our lives -- from Oregon, Michigan, West Virginia, California and everywhere in-between and beyond! -- we are richly blessed. THANK YOU for your prayers, your love, your emails, your gifts, your texts, your monthly support and most of all, your friendship.

As we move into the next phase of our journey, we are confident that God is leading the way, and that we will continue to experience the richest blessing of all -- meaningful relationships with people who will share this journey with us!

Go ahead and take the plunge, the best friendships you ever have, will be forged on the water where Jesus is building His Kingdom!

If you want to learn more about the next phase of our journey, check out this 10 minute video explaining how we’re taking Overboard Ministries, overboard! If you would like to join the Overboard family thru prayer or thru monthly financial support, click the links! (For monthly support, click the link, choose one of the three options, and then select "Joseph Castaneda" from the drop-down menu. Remember, all gifts are fully tax-deductible!)

Two years ago we began preparing for THIS day!

On March 20th, 2013, right around 5pm, we pulled into the back driveway of a snowy Lake Ann Camp, having just completed a 2,500 mile van ride from Salem, Oregon. We had spent five days on the road seeing family along the way, and the kids looked at their new home for the first time (Traci and I had seen it just once before). We were all nervous, we were all excited and we were all...VERY hungry! We grabbed dinner at Papa’s J’s pizza across the street and spent the first night in our new digs. No mattresses, no couches -- no furniture of any kind -- but a lot of hope and energy about our future in God’s grand plan. Today, one day shy of what would have been our second anniversary at the camp, we’re officially launching the next phase of our lives and ministry. Who knew that two years ago today, we were already preparing for this moment?

Thankfully...God knew!

Traci and I have been on this wild journey, and we count it a true honor that so many of you have journeyed with us! When we left Salem in 2013, we left behind a great church with awesome friendships and meaningful relationships, and we headed to Northern Michigan, unsure of what was waiting. Our hearts truly ached to leave a place that had been home for over 12 years to our family, a church that had been the only ones our children knew and a city where most of my family still lived. Montana was the furthest “east” any of our family had settled.

On March 20th 2013, Lake Ann Camp became our new home and we quickly settled into life and work God had so clearly called us to. Although our time at LAC ended abruptly with heart break just two years later, the time of ministry God gave us was awesome! We wouldn’t trade it for anything. And clearly, through it all, God was already preparing us for this day.

So today, we are excited to officially launch Overboard Ministries, full-time, and begin chasing after the big dreams that God has placed in our hearts.

Back in April of 2011, I published my first book, Project Joseph. In the process of writing the first manuscript, I began researching how to get the book published. I read blogs (started this one, too), interviewed authors, called publishing companies and submitted several letters with a copy of my book. Through many rejections, one letter was returned by a publisher that had clearly done two things: first, the respondent had actually read my book and second, he had taken the time to send a personal response.

I know publishing houses don’t have time to read every submission and don’t have the man-power to personally respond to every request, but I was grateful for this one letter. In it, the reviewer of my book encouraged me to complete the manuscript and finish the project to completion. He told me that his company published a very narrow style of book, and my writing wasn’t in that style. However, he assured me that it was a book worth writing and that I should pursue it all the way to publishing.

That letter is one of the main reasons Overboard Ministries exists.

As we approach the four year anniversary of Overboard Ministries this April, we have published 9 books by 8 authors, and 3 more books will be out within the next month or two. We have several projects lining up in the ranks, and by the end of 2015 it is likely we will have close to 20 books in our arsenal! But publishing books is only part of the dream of Overboard Ministries.

Honestly, when Traci and I first began to dream up the Overboard Ministries concept, we hoped that the publishing arm would become a financial tool by which we could fund other facets of the ministry. We thought Overboard would involve:

1. Speaking to high school and middle school students
2. Investing in couples and marriages through classes, seminars and retreats
3. Ministry to those in ministry -- coming alongside pastors and their wives
4. Mentoring youth pastors and those going into full-time student ministry
5. Publishing books that are intensely biblical and intensely practical.

But these things aren’t being done to simply maintain the status quo. Overboard Ministries is about helping believers live their God-designed lives out of the comfort of the boat, and out on the water where Jesus is building His Kingdom. We want to challenge students to live-out their faith in radical ways on their school campuses, sports teams and in their own homes. Traci and I have a passion to see couples put faith in to practice in how they approach every aspect of their marriages. We know too many pastors (and wives!) in ministry who have been so beat up and wounded, that they’re simply existing day-by day; we want to encourage them and help restore their passions to dream God-sized dreams for their organizations! I have met too many youth pastors who fit the young youth pastor stereotype (it’s not a good one!). I love to help young guys develop a faith-driven philosophy of ministry that will challenge students -- and parents! -- to put faith into practice every day, while also helping these guys develop long-term ministry strategies. And our books must continue to be intensely biblical and intensely practical, challenging readers to make their faith an everyday experience.

As God has walked us through this amazing journey together, and brought us to the place of taking this thing full-time, Traci and I know that Overboard Ministries will only be as strong as the team He continues to put around us. So many of you have encouraged us over the past two months with financial gifts that have brought us to tears, and many more have overwhelmed us with words of encouragements, powerful passages of Scripture and timely texts. THANK YOU.

So we’re asking you to continue your relationship with Overboard -- with Traci and me -- as we move into the next phase of this ministry. We are looking to gain true partners in ministry in two main areas: prayer and financial support. First of all, we know the heart of Overboard is going to be our prayer team. Not just people who say, “hey, I’ll pray for you...” (I’ve been guilty of that more times that I care to admit!), but people who will add us to their daily prayer list, will read over our regular prayer updates and will ask God to do amazing work in, and through, us. CLICK HERE to be added to the Overboard Ministries prayer list.

Secondly, we are anxious to find people who believe in Traci and me, and the vision we have for Overboard, and who will come along side us with monthly financial support. We have supported friends in the past, so we know what a huge commitment this is, and yet we also know the joy of sharing in the work of others through our financial gifts. While prayer is the heart of Overboard, monthly support is the backbone. Would you consider supporting Overboard Ministries with a monthly gift? Whether it’s $10 a month or $1,000 a month, your investment in Overboard is an investment in the work that God is going to continue to do through this ministry. (Maybe for you, you’d like to make a one-time gift to help jump-start our work today. That’s awesome!) All gifts are tax-deductible through our partnership with Ripe for Harvest, and if you want to be a part of our monthly support, click HERE. (choose one of the payment options, and then select "Joe Castaneda" from the drop-down list)

I believe God loves it when His children step out in faith and express audacious goals! Our audacious goal for raising support is this: we want to find at least 100 monthly financial partners between now and April 30th (just six weeks away!). That number seems so obnoxiously large to me, but our God is so obnoxiously bigger than anything I could ever dream up! A big verse for me the past few years has been Ephesians 3:20 (in The Message) “God can do anything, you know, far more than you could ever imagine, guess or request in your wildest dreams...” I love that! Our audacious goals are nothing in God’s eyes, and so even as we set this one, we know He can do more.

And as our team, our Overboard family, grows, we long to keep our relationship a two-way connection. Traci and I are already preparing a prayer wall where the names and faces of our supporters will be prominent so that we remember to pray for, and support, you, too. From day one we want to build lasting relationships so that all of us can share in the great work that God will do as Overboard Ministries moves forward.

I can’t wait to share with you all that God is going to do, and I can’t wait to hear about all that God is doing in your life as you come along side and partner with us. If the past few months have been any indication of what He has in store...then the next part of this journey will be an adventure worth sharing!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

Check out this 10-minute video that explains even more about Overboard Ministries, and be sure to visit our web site to learn more, or to join our team: www.overboardministries.com

Living the dream!

Have you ever been inspired by a movie, song or book? I don’t mean just moved by something you saw, heard or read, I’m asking, have you ever been truly inspired and changed by a powerful film, a meaningful book or a thought-provoking song? In the summer of 2010, I reluctantly read a book for one reason: a good friend, who also was on our church’s elder board at the time, recommended it to me. I was not a fan of the author, in fact, I was an anti-fan of the author, and I really had no interest in his latest book. However, Kent is one of the smartest people I know, he is full of wisdom and grace, and he reassured me that this was an important book for me to read. I bought a copy from Amazon and let it sit on my desk for the month of June.

In the middle of July, Traci and I packed up the kids for a three-week-long road trip. We would spend the first week at camp TLC in northern California, where I would speak and our family would enjoy the pool and a great camp setting. The next two weeks would be spent vacationing, mostly in southern California. The day before we left for camp, I closed up my office, grabbed my notes and saw the book on my desk. I debated taking it but decided that Kent would only recommend a book if he really saw value in it for me.

The best decision I made in the summer of 2010 was taking A Million Miles in a Thousand Years with me to Camp.

After I checked-in with the director of the camp, we set up our little cabin and looked over the schedule. I didn’t have any speaking duties until after dinner, so Traci and I took the kids for an afternoon swim. When we returned to the cabin to let the kids rest before dinner, I reluctantly opened up the book by Donald Miller and began reading.

I was instantly captivated by Don’s story, impressed by the transformation he had experienced from his previous books, and eager to see where this story was going. I read the book by Tuesday afternoon and begged Traci to start reading it, too. By Friday we had both completed the book (I actually read it a second time that week) and we began a journey that, ultimately, led us to northern Michigan, and is leading us to launch Overboard Ministries full time!

If you haven’t read A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, I highly recommend that you do. As Don unpacks his journey from passive observer to active participant in his own life, and as he reveals the qualities that make a life worth living -- a story worth telling -- he invites you to share in the same adventure. Don’s invitation was the fuel I needed to take the next step (at the time) with my writing and with Overboard Ministries.

On Friday night, the last night of camp, I spoke the final chapel message in the outdoor amphitheater under a clear California sky. I preached a familiar end-of-week message, based on the story of Jesus and Peter walking on water in Matthew 14. In the story, Jesus walks on the Sea of Galilee toward the disciples who are in a boat. The wind is howling, waves are pounding the ship and the disciples are terrified as this “ghost” is walking near them in the middle of the storm.

Suddenly, Jesus calls out to them so they know it’s Him, and Peter replies, “Lord if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water.” Jesus replies, “Come.” So Peter, in a moment of unbelievable faith and courage, jumps out of the boat and walks on water with Jesus! It’s at that moment that I love to stop, and ask everyone to think about the other 11 disciples who are still in the boat. What are they feeling? What are they doing? Do you think any of them is worried about the ghost or the storm any more? Not a chance! They are focused on Peter as he does the impossible!

In the message, I challenge campers to “get out of the boat” for Jesus, and to live a life of faith for Him. The boat is comfortable, the boat is “safe” and the boat is where most people are living. But, Jesus isn’t in the boat, and Jesus is calling us out of our safety, out of our comfort and entirely out of the boat in order to build His Kingdom out on the water. More than once I’ve preached, “I’d rather fail a hundred times trying to get out of the boat, then live another “successful” day in the boat."

It’s time to live Overboard.

As Traci and I, and the kids, headed for vacation the next day, we continued the conversation from Don’s book. We talked about what it would look like to write the story of our lives in such a way, that it would be a story worth sharing, a story worth inviting others to be a part of, a story with which others would want to connect.

During that vacation, the idea of launching Overboard Ministries was born. (You can read more of that story here.) While it started with a publishing company, the dream was for much more, including ministry to couples, mentorship of youth pastors and investment in pastors and their wives. We began, informally, making Overboard a reality during our years in Salem, and continued that work when we moved to Michigan. In many ways, we’ve truly been living the dream since that summer in 2010.

And we have no intentions of stopping now.

In the past, Overboard Ministries has been a part-time addition to my regular ministry duties. As of January 16th, that’s all changed.

As Traci recently reminded, “It’s time to take Overboard...Overboard!”

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

Yesterday’s blog was about the lessons learned in that past two years here in Michigan. Thursday’s blog will reveal the details of the partnerships we’re trying to build. Thanks for joining us as we try to create a story worth living and sharing with others!

Looking back one last time...

Today we officially cleared out of the house that has been our home for the past two years. In fact, it was exactly two years ago today we drove off in our fully loaded minivan, and began a 2,500 mile trek from Salem, Oregon to Lake Ann, MI (which included a very circuitous route). What a wild journey we’ve been on during this time! The next phase of our journey is shaping up to be another great adventure, as God has given us the next few steps to take. (Thursday’s blog will roll out the details of the next part of our future, be sure to check back at 10:01 EST, 7:01 PST, thursday morning). Today, however, I wanted to reflect on four of the great things that have happened while we’ve been here, reminders of how clearly the Lord worked in our lives to bring us here.

* During our time at LAC, God has given us so many great relationships! Sometimes Traci and I have had to remind ourselves we’ve only been here two years, yet with relationships that are so deep, it seems like it has been many more. Bruce, Lyndsey, Tom, Tammi, Brandon, Rachel, Craig, Kori, Mandi, Dave, Brenda, Terry, Jenn, Taylor, Bryan, Ginger, Terase, Justin, Jaqi, Ramon, Jo, Dan, Brent, Sue, Larry, Deann, Steve and Jan just to name a few! Honestly, this list of dear friends could be the entire blog, and I’m sure I’d still leave a few names out! THANK YOU to all of you for embracing the Castaneda’s into your lives -- we have been so enriched because of it!

* We’ve had a unique view of God’s work from a ministry position that gave us a broader audience with which to connect. We’ve seen the lives of students changed as they’ve embraced the truth of God’s Word. Several couples have thanked us for the work Traci and I have been privileged to do through our marriage seminars. Truly one of our greatest joys has been ministering to those in ministry, a task we joyfully look forward to in the next phase of Overboard Ministries!

* I’ve personally enjoyed broadening my work experience by delving into the world of marketing and promotion. January 1st, two weeks before I was let go, it was exciting to see summer pre-registration numbers at a level they had not been at for over five years! Learning how to market to church leaders and individuals, how to work with a talented intern to build a brand new web site and how to harness the power of social media will, I’m confident, be tools that we will used in the near future. The new work experiences have been great.

* Our children have had the joy of being around some incredibly godly young people. Many of the year-around interns have become close “friends” with my kids, and the summer staff has been awesome about making AJ, BJ and CJ feel loved and blessed to be at LAC. One of the great losses for us in this experience, is the loss of the personal connection that unfolds while living on site during the summer camping season, yet it has been something our family will look back on with great fondness.

There are many more blessings we could count, but I could fill dozens of blog posts trying to name them all. Instead, it’s just good to remember that what has happened over the past two months doesn’t define or negate what God has done the past two years.

It’s hard to believe that our time at Lake Ann Camp is over. We’ve learned so much during the past two years of experiences, we’ve grown so much during these past two months of disappointment, and we’re eager to see what God will do thru this next phase of our lives and ministry. As we move forward, we want to remember the faithfulness of God in the past, and know that He will continue to work in us and thru us, to do His work.

The God who called us Overboard on March 15th, 2013, is the same God calling us Overboard on March 15th, 2015. We are, as always, in the care of His good hands!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

You gotta see this view!

This past week, Traci and I took her parents to see the massive ice blocks on Lake Michigan. The view is hard to describe, but imagine that God has a giant box of building blocks all made out of ice, and that he took that box and dumped it over the 22,394 square miles of Lake Michigan. Of course, if they are God’s building blocks, they are HUGE blocks, and that’s what we took Traci’s parents to see. The amazing ice formations are drawing national attention again (something similar happened last year) and everyone in the area is talking about them. So on a beautiful and sunny Friday afternoon, you’d think the place would be packed. Instead, in the main area of ice block where we visited, I don’t think I saw a dozen people spread out over the miles of ice we could see. Why would so few people get out to the ice?

I have a thought: because it’s so hard to get to them!

When we parked our van and stepped out into the 20 degree winter air, I warned my in-laws that the wind on the Lake would be significant. We had bundled up before we left the house, but Traci and I started putting on our gloves, cinching down our hats, zipping up coats to the chin and generally preparing for Winter-geddon. I think my in-laws thought we were a little crazy, because where we were standing was actually pleasant. With a 20-degree temp (18 degrees warmer than the previous day’s high!), the sun shining and the breeze just gently blowing, it was hard to imagine that when we stepped out of the tree line, about 100 yards away, we’d be slapped by Old Man Winter!

Then we took the first step onto the shoreline and the wind smacked us from the south. It stung, and we had just stepped on the frozen sand! 30 feet later we were on the frozen waters of Lake Michigan and now we were fully exposed to the gusting wind. And that was only half the problem, because now we were walking in 6-8” snow drifts that were covering the very uneven ice on the shallower parts of the Lake.

While we could see God’s giant ice block collection in front of us, we had to cover a 1/3 mile of this uneven frozen ground to get there! (Basically, think of a small wave rolling into shore, and then freezing while it’s still in wave form, or as it crashes on another wave or on the shore. That’s what the surface of the lake is like in the parts closer to shore that you have to cross in order to get to God’s ice blocks.) About half way out, the wind picked up its intensity and the ground became increasingly difficult to walk on. I’ve never been drunk, but I imagine I looked like a drunk man stumbling around looking for my lost car!

After about 20 minutes of walking/hiking/stumbling we arrived at these beautiful ice structures. The actual view is hard to put into words, and the pictures we took don’t do it justice. The whole area looked like NY City after Godzilla destroyed all the buildings and uprooted the roads. There wasn’t a piece of level ground as far as the eye could see. Ice blocks, the shape and size of airplane wings, stuck out all over. A giant round column, (it looked like God put water in a bucket, froze it, and then tipped it over) probably 10-12’ tall, stood a hundred feet from us. Rectangles, Triangles and just tons of leftover ice parts were strewn about. You could climb up 6-7’ up one ice chunk, and descend 8’ into a little “cave” below it. The whole time you had to keep reminding yourself that you’re standing a 1/2 mile ON Lake Michigan, which has an average depth of 279 feet!!

The ice on Lake Michigan has drawn national attention, and everyone in the area is talking about it. But not many people are actually visiting this Winter Wonder! I’m a little shocked because this isn’t an annual event (although it has happened each of the last two winters), and missing out on it this year could mean missing out for another 20-30 years.

Here are a few thoughts.

1. The journey is hard, so people settle for the stories of others: Truth is, it wasn’t easy getting out to the ice. The wind was bitterly cold and blisteringly sharp. Walking through the 6-8” snow drifts that covered treacherously uneven ice was hard. More than once I thought I was about to bite it on the ice. Twice we came across open expanses of ice that were clear, and looked straight into the water, giving the sense that it was fragile. (Strangely, there was more comfort in walking on snow-covered ice!) In the same way, so much of what most of us want in life is “out there” and requires a difficult journey to find. How many times have you talked about your future, your dreams, your God-given passions, but when you looked at the journey from here to there, you just settled for the stories of others?

2. 

   The destination is so far away, people wonder if it’s really worth it: We could see the ice blocks from the shore, and they already looked impressive. Could the view really be that much better from up close? When the wind slapped us with negative zero wind chills, the distant view seemed like it would be sufficient. Our God-given dreams can have the same appeal, we can let ourselves believe that the view of them from far away will be just as good as the view from directly beneath or over them. It’s like living thru a northern Michigan winter and studying pictures of Hawaii to get your vitamin D fix -- the pictures are great, but there’s nothing like the real thing!

3. The horror stories of others can keep us in the car: Tons of people talk about how great the ice formations are, and just as many talk about the dangers. News stories of people nearly falling through the ice or slipping into a frozen tomb frequent the local broadcasts and newspapers. Let’s remember, we’re talking about walking on a massive body of water that has a larger area than 9 states and The District, and is just barely smaller than West Virginia! Over the years, I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about people who have chased their God-sized dreams, too. People who have been wrongfully accused, have lost friends, have ended financially ruined because of their pursuit of what they believed God had put in their hearts. They really believed they were following God’s plans, but the outcome was, at least from our finite human perspective, a total loss. The failures of others can keep our own dreams grounded.
4. Ultimately, getting out on the ice requires quite a bit of work: To walk out on Lake Michigan, you really have to prep. First of all, you have to wait for the right conditions, and the right conditions that can freeze a lake the size of West Virginia involve ultra-freezing temps! You have to own the right gear, you have to know where to research to find the right access points and you have to be willing to drive some less-than-desirable roads to get to a place where you can actually walk on the lake. In the same way, chasing the passions God has given you requires prep, research, patience and a willingness to venture into unchartered (or rarely chartered) waters. The journey is hard (point #1), but preparation for the journey has its own challenges, too.

I’m glad we made the trip to see God’s ice blocks this week. I’m confident we won’t soon forget the amazing formations, and we have a fun story to share with our kids and with others. Even more, I’m glad we’re headed to our next great adventure with God. The journey is hard, but we’re not going to settle for the stories of others. The destination seems like it’s a lifetime away, but we know it will be worth it! The road of faith is littered with stories of those who didn’t get to see their dreams fulfilled in this life, but our our faith is helping us overcome our fears. And yes, it has been a lot of hard work -- and yes, more hard work is in the future -- but being ready when the call comes is worth the work!

What about you? Are you settling for the stories of others? Are you questioning the value of God’s dreams for you? Have you let the horror stories or fears of others derail you? Has the hard work of preparation been overwhelming? “‘I know the plans I have for you’, declares the Lord. ‘Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future’” (Jeremiah 29:11). Will you trust His plans for you today? “Trust me” God is saying to you, “you’ve gotta see this view!”

Go ahead and take the plunge, the view is always better on the water!

Why I date my wife

If you have ever been with Traci and I when we’ve taught a couples’ class, or if you’ve sat through one of our weekend seminars, you know that we are big fans of dating! Before we were married we dated all the time. After we tied the knot, we dated quite a bit. When AJ, our first child, was born, we dated some, and then somewhere in-between AJ and BJ (about 14 months) our dating came to screeching halt. If you’re married, with or without kids, you know what I’m talking about -- life hits and dating suddenly isn’t much of a priority, it’s more like a luxury.

Shortly after BJ was born, I had one of those Ah-Ha moments, and I worked hard to start making dating a priority again. It wasn’t an easy task. and it often required lots of creativity because our budget was particularly tight, but we made it work. Ever since then, almost without fail, we have taken the time to date on a very regular basis (3-4 times every month).

Today we tell couples all the time, “You need to go on regular dates” and believe me, we have heard every excuse in the book for why that  “just won’t work for us.” Kids. Work. Working kids. In-laws. Out-laws. Bowling league (yes, there was actually a young man who dropped that one on me!). Tiredness. Online video games (don’t ask). No babysitters. No trusted babysitters. No money. Nothing to do. And on and on.

The old adage is true, “where there is a will, there is a way” and Traci and I know from

experience, you can make dating work every week, on any budget, all the time. Yes, we’ve swapped child care with friends so we could date. Yes, we’ve paid babysitters all our “discretionary money” and walked the mall or the park for a date. We’ve eaten out, we’ve eaten in (shipped the kids to grandma’s house), we’ve watched movies, we’ve watched people and we’ve gazed at the stars. What we’ve learned is that the actual date activity has very little to do with the value of the date, the date itself is what matters.

So why do I work so hard to date my wife? Here are 8 reasons and I hope it encourages you and your spouse to keep dating!

1. Dating reminds my wife that she is a priority in my life. Traci knows that she is a priority in my life, but dating lets her feel like a priority, too. When the calendar is cleared specifically so I can spend time with her, I’m reinforcing my commitment to her and to our marriage. Our dates are often a time for her to catch me up on the parts of mom-life that I don’t always see (see #4 below), and for her to get my input and feedback about challenges with our kids. When we date, she knows that my focus is on her (and her focus is on me), and that goes a long way in reinforcing how important our relationship is to me.
2. Dating reminds me that my wife is a priority in my life. Sometimes in the craziness of work, of juggling the kids’ schedules and trying to manage our routines, it can become easy for me to relegate my marriage to “I’ll work on that next week when I have more time...” Regular dating reminds me that the relationship I have with Traci is second only to my relationship with God.
3. Dating reminds my kids that my wife is a priority in my life. Sometimes our youngest daughter, CJ, will lament, “Are you guys going on another date?” I always laugh, and I always remind her, dating her mom is one of the highlights of my week. It makes our marriage better and also improves our parenting. In the future, I’m confident both of my girls will look for godly men who will date them long after they’ve said “I Do!” (Or said young men will be receiving a very unpleasant visit from their father-in-law!)
4. Dating allows us to communicate about things that often get neglected. Whether it’s a walk at the mall, dinner and a movie or a visit to a nearby ball park, date night is ultimately about Traci, and about our relationship, not about the activity. This gives us plenty of time to talk about things that often get neglected in marriage. We’ve spent dates talking about finances, dreaming about the future, talking about sex, working thru issues with the kids and even struggles in work or with her business. By making our dates regular, these discussions become an outlet, not a downer, and they often lead to problem-solving and confirmation that we’re on the same page.
5. Dating is just plain romantic. If you feel like there is little romance in your marriage, if you feel like the sexual connection you have is less than desirable, believe me, putting effort into regular dates should be high on your priority list! Dating puts you face-to-face with your spouse, allows you to walk hand-in-hand and helps build intimacy through the romance of being “out” together. I’m confident that when Traci and I started making dating a priority again (almost 12 years ago!), the romance returned stronger than ever.
6. [regular] Dating has forced me to be thoughtful and creative. If you date regularly, dinner and movie will only work for so long. First off, there aren’t that many good movies out in a year, and secondly, it can be a spendy night. Dating my wife on a weekly basis has really forced me (and her, since we take turns planning date night) to be thoughtful and creative about our dates. Now that we don’t live anywhere near family, overnight dates have been more challenging...but they still happen because of thoughtful and creative planning!
7. Dating tells others that our marriage is a priority. I love telling people, “Sorry, that night won’t work for [insert event invitation here] because that’s our date night.” Often, people respond with, “Wow...I haven’t been on a date with my spouse in years!” and it almost always leads to conversation about how to make it work. When other people see that we are committed to dating each other, they know we are committed to strengthening our marriage, and it encourages them to do the same!
8. Dating slows the pace of life for a few moments. When we date, we work hard to turn off the phones and “disconnect” for the time we have together. There is something special about slowing down for a few moments, and together, enjoying the world around us. When we date, we tend to find more pleasure in our relationship, but also in our work, in our children and even in our trials and hardships! Dating allows us to slow the pace of life and enjoy the views God has given us.

I hope you and your spouse are dating, and if not, this is a great time to start! Commit to a regular date even it starts at once a month or if you boldly step in to once a week. Your commitment to invest in your marriage will pay off, on your first date, AND in the years to come as you keep dating a priority. Take your spouse on a date this weekend!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life -- including your marriage! -- is better on the water.

Our next adventure begins!

For the past six weeks, Traci and I have been on a roller coaster ride of change. Uncertainty about a job, a house, a future ministry etc... has been challenging us each day. I want to thank each of you for supporting us during this journey and for all of your words of encouragement, your prayers and your genuine concern as we’ve navigated this season. While the changes aren’t finished, we are excited to report that a few issues are starting to come into focus. Let’s start with what we can’t tell you. We still don’t know where we’re going to live, although we really want to stay local and keep our kids in school at least through the end of this year. When we came to Michigan in March of 2013, we pulled our kids out of school, mid-semester, and moved across country. The school change was tough, and our hope is to avoid the mid-semester change if possible.

Our housing prayer right now is two fold. First, we’re asking God to give us a temporary housing solution to navigate the remainder of this school year. We would be happy to stay close to Lake Ann if that was possible, but we would be fine if it meant Traverse City (about 15 miles east of where we live). Secondly, we are asking God to provide real clarity about where we will be long-term. (This of course reminds me of a blog I once read about God loving grand entrances or some non-sense like that!)

That brings us to what we can tell you.

This April will mark the four year anniversary of the launch of Overboard Ministries. While Overboard debuted as a publishing company, Traci and I have talked about a number of aspects of the ministry that include serving couples, pastors, parents and students. The publishing arm of Overboard Ministries got things started, but in our hearts we have longed to expand the work even more, and to one day use the publishing arm to fund other facets of our ministry.

Over the four years since then, we’ve drawn up more plans and ideas. I’ve spent a lot of time consulting with leaders, pastors, mentors, businessmen and entrepreneurs to start casting a larger vision for this idea God has rooted in our hearts. Of course, during this time Traci was working her own passions and business, and I was blessed to finish up 12 years as a youth pastor in Salem, Oregon, and 22 months here in Lake Ann, MI.

As Traci and I have prayed over the past six weeks, we have come to conclusion that it’s time to take Overboard Ministries full time. As Traci said, “It’s time to take Overboard...overboard.”

Before I was let go on January 16th, God had already allowed my path to cross with dozens and dozens of ministry leaders throughout Michigan (and beyond). One such man owns a retreat center about 90 minutes from where we currently live. 25 year ago, he left a thriving youth ministry in Florida to return to Kalkaska, MI and build a camp from the ground up! Starwood Ranch is an 85-bed facility that groups rent and run their own programs (whereas the camp we’re leaving primarily runs it’s own programs in summer and winter, and does group rentals in the off-season).

Steve (the owner of Starwood) would love to partner with Overboard Ministries to explore ways to expand Starwood’s ministry to churches in the area, and to create a win/win for both Starwood and Overboard. In one very real sense, there is no official job being offered. In other sense, Starwood will become the geographic launching pad for what Traci and I believe will be a long-term relationship (even if we end of up leaving Michigan down the road). Ministry to couples, to pastors, parents and students will be high on our priority list, and Starwood will allow me to use my gifts now, while implementing the vision for Overboard in the future.

So, in order to launch Overboard Ministries and begin a partnership with Starwood Ranch, Traci and I are confident that God is leading us to raise our own support. This is both exciting and terrifying (“Excitifying!”*), but we have no doubts about the next few steps God has put in front of us. Next Monday we will role out a short video explaining how we will be raising our support, the details of our support and how you can jump overboard with us! God has connected us to a great ministry -- called Ripe for Harvest -- that will make donations a snap and fully tax-deductible (they are a 501(3)c).

One chapter of our lives has definitely come to a close, even though it was shorter than we had anticipated. Another chapter is being written. I can honestly tell you that God’s Word has been such a help through it all, and in particular, almost from the beginning, Psalm 143:8 has been one of my regular prayer requests: “If you wake me each morning with the sound of your loving voice, I’ll go to sleep each night trusting you. Point out the road I must travel; I’m all ears, all eyes before you” (The Message). God has pointed out the next road we must travel, and we can’t wait to see what He has in store for us next. Stay tuned.

Go ahead and take the plunge, even if it’s Excitifying, because life is always better on the water!

*Like its sister word, "Territhrilled" (see entry in Overboard blogtionary), Excitifying is compound-emotive word, linking two strong sentiments together. "Exciting" indicates a happy, thrilling, adrenaline pumping moment like when a person is preparing to jump out of an airplane at 10,000 feet. "Terrifying" indicates a strong feeling of adrenaline pumping horror, like when a person who is about to jump out of an airplane at 10,000 feet realizes what 10,000 feet above the ground looks like! Often there is no sound uttered when a person is Excitified, as both the potential thrill of success and terror of failure combine to remove all vocal capabilities.

Learning to be Uncomfortable.

A few days back I had this kind of funny thought: “God sure doesn’t want me being too comfortable these days!” With my recent job loss and uncertain housing and work future (although I have some exciting news to share with you on my next blog post...stay tuned!), the desire to be comfortable has certainly been low on the totem pole. I’d take “employed” and “housed” long before I’d take comfortable! In and of itself, comfortable isn’t a bad thing. There are people who believe that true followers of God must be miserably uncomfortable in order to show their esteem for God. Nothing in Scripture would suggest that this is true. However, comfort can become an excuse to not do what God has asked you to do. Neither of these extremes works for someone trying to live the Overboard Life.

While pondering these thoughts, I came across this awesome video by an American made garment company making waves in the fashion industry by selling their self-proclaimed “world’s best” zip-up hoodie for $90. A recent write up on a popular web site shot their product sales thru the roof, and for a short time, sales for a hoodie -- yes, a hoodie -- were back ordered for 5 months! American Giant went to work to increase productivity, find new suppliers and improve their warehouse and shipping efficiency. American Giant understands the dangers of being comfortable. Check out their ad:

http://youtu.be/iGWwAMfTCKk

This season of discomfort has been good for me. It has reminded me of the things that are important and helped me to reinvest in the habits and patterns that I need in order to achieve what the Lord has put on my heart. Early mornings and late nights are generally not the hours that the comfort-lovers participate in. I’ve been reminded at how important the extra moments of each day are, choosing to spend those spare minutes investing intentionally in relationships, building business partnerships and engaging my wife and kids more often. Discomfort has improved my time management.

Discomfort has also re-fueled my passions. I want to be a person that is driven primarily by values and beliefs, not organizational bureaucracy or  paycheck-driven work. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of working because you get paid, or to belong to something that isn’t value driven but is comfortable or easy. Discomfort has returned a fire in my belly to live/work/play/worship/serve/love/give/dream according to the God-given values that make life worth living: self-sacrifice, contentment, faith, love, belief, forgiveness, trust, generosity etc...

I have also been the recipient of a healthy dose of perspective during this time of upheaval. While trying to navigate what's next for our family, I've been far more aware of the plight of others. My friend Caleb is ministering in the Ukraine, and is experiencing, first hand, the ravages of war (his blog is outstanding, and would be worth your time). All around the world, Christians are being publicly persecuted, beaten and murdered as punishment for their faith. Being jobless and homeless is a big deal, but it has been good for me to keep our journey in perspective.

Finally, this period of discomfort has fired up my desire to create and dream. I think I just came out of a season where I felt creativity was stifled, and where constant turn over created an environment of fear and uncertainty. Fear kills dreams, and stifling creativity forges an environment where creating something new is almost impossible. The level of discomfort God has allowed us to experience has fired up the ol’ dream machine again, and now, more than ever, I’m eager to engage in the creative process of building something new (you really need to read Monday’s blog post!).

I can’t say I’ve become a fan of being uncomfortable, but in a strange way, I’m starting to enjoy the feeling. After all, the Bible reminds us that, ultimately, I'm a sojourner in this world. Still, I’m praying that God will allow us to find a life-rhythm that will allow us to have a place to live, a clear direction for service (part of that prayer is already taking shape...check back on Monday!) and a comfortable level of discomfort (commonly referred to as “Disuncomfort”*) where time is managed well, passions are fueled, perspective is kept and dreams inspire creative growth.

At the end of 1 Peter, the apostle reminds us, “...and after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen and establish you.” Those are great words of encouragement for the imprisoned, the persecuted and for those who’ve had life turned upside-down on them.

Go ahead and take the plunge -- it might be a little uncomfortable, but -- life is always better on the water!

*Dis.un.comfort.able: “Dis” is from the popular early 90s phrase [as in, “I’m going to dis you for treating me like that’] and “un” implying the opposite of whatever is next [as in, “un-cool” or “un-sure”], combine with “comfortable” which means “affording or enjoying contentment and security.” Therefore, disuncomfortable is a proper double negative implying the speaker is dissing not being comfortable. Disuncomfortable is a state-of-mind, and generally only used by those experiencing being uncomfortable but are choosing to enjoy their present circumstances, regardless.

God loves a grand entrance!

I read a book by Mark Batterson this past year. Actually, I’ve read the book a couple of times, and finished it up again toward the end of 2014. In the book, Batterson has this great line about God’s timing. He talks about how God loves to make a grand entrance into our lives, showing up in “just the nick of time...” in order to display His grace, His power and His divine sense of timing. When it comes to our struggles and questions, we usually have a vastly different timeline than God does. We want answers now, we want His provision well-ahead of time, and we usually want miracles in our timing, not His. God sees the big picture, though, and He knows the exact best moment to provide, bless, answer or show up. So as Batterson writes, “Rarely is God early...but He is NEVER late!”

Have you ever found yourself in God’s waiting room? Have you walked thru a health difficulty and wondered if God would step in? Maybe you’re going thru a job change like Traci and I are right now, and you’re wondering how to pay the bills or find a place to live when you don’t have any income? Are you experiencing heartache in your marriage right now, and you’re asking God to step in and “fix” it? Do you have a child that’s making some really poor decisions? Are you worried about your education, wanting God to intervene as you look to the future? Is your job situation lousy and do you find yourself asking God to give you another option so you can leave? Do you have more going out then coming in to your checkbook each month?

We’ve all been there at one time or another, waiting on God to show up and do His thing. Waiting for Him to intervene in our lives and to take a hurt and mend it, turn a wrong into a right or just plain help out when we don’t know where to turn next. I’m there right now, asking Him to clearly reveal the next step in our lives as Traci and I embark on this unexpected new chapter in our lives.

This one thing I know while I wait: God loves a grand entrance.

Overboard Ministries was forged out of a message I prepared for camp, from Matthew 14. After Jesus has preached an all-day message and performed a miraculous feeding of over 5,000 people, he ends the long day by dismissing the crowds, sending his 12 disciples home on a boat, and then heads up a hillside to spend some time praying to the Father.

While He is up there, and while the disciples are lazily crossing the Sea of Galilee, a storm comes charging over the top of the mountains and crashes hard on the water. A reasonably tranquil trip is suddenly thrown into chaos and the 12 disciples become fairly concerned about their own safety.

Think about how God could have handled this:

1. He could have prevented the storm from the beginning.
2. He could have stopped the storm shortly after it formed.
3. He could have made the disciples fall into a deep sleep, and slept through the storm.
4. He could have teleported them to the shore and boycotted the storm all together.
5. He could have provided better seats, in-boat food service and a large bucket of ice cream.

Instead, what does God do? He sends His Son to make a rather grand entrance!

When Jesus finishes praying on top of the hill side, He heads down to the water and takes a stroll across the lake to see how the boys are doing. In John’s Gospel we find out that He actually wasn’t going to visit the boys in the boat, He was walking to the other side to meet them at the shore. Suddenly the disciples see a figure walking on the water and their night has just gone from bad to worse, because now there is a ghost walking on the turbulent lake!

Matthew 14 says they “cried out in fear” [translation: screamed like little girls!] believing the end was in sight.

And isn’t that where we sometimes find ourselves? We look around at our circumstances, the storms in our lives are raging at full scale, nothing seems to be going our way, and we’re fairly certain that we’re at the end. We cry out in fear. You ever been there? Are you living there now? Are you living at that point where you’ve hit the end of your rope and you feel like there is nothing left to do but cry out in fear/anger/disappointment/confusion and hold on for dear life?

Suddenly God makes a grand entrance into the Matthew 14 story as Jesus reveals Himself. Peter miraculously walks with Him on water. Jesus calms the storm. He climbs in the boat and then takes it to the other side of the lake. Life continues with the dawn of the next morning.

If you’re in one of those seasons right now, let me encourage you to keep your faith rooted in the One who loves to make a grand entrance. Let me encourage you to trust the One who says, “All things work together for good, to those who love [me]...” and is quoted as saying, “[I] will supply all your needs according to [my] riches in glory...” and was even once quoted with these words, “[I] can do anything you know, fare more than you could ever imagine, guess or request in your wildest dreams...”

Believe me, I wish God would more frequently show up early (according to my schedule)! But when everything is said and done, I’m always glad He showed up on His schedule because I know, that He knows, the very best timing for me -- the time/place where my faith will be extended, my character will be forged and where I will become more of the man He wants me to be, better prepared for what He wants me to do.

I’m learning to trust Him more and more each day, even as I’m awaiting His grand entrance onto the stage of my story. If you’re in a pinch today, will you reaffirm your trust of God and His timing in your life? Will you pray like crazy for answers/money/miracles/jobs/children/spouse/health but be willing to wait for God to answer on His schedule? It’s not an easy task but the future will be best after God makes His grand entrance!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

The day I thought Jesus was a Mack truck

Have you ever had one of those moments where you were pretty sure you were about to walk into the light and see God? A moment when you were about to find out what’s on the other side of the curtain of this life? In the winter of 1995, I had one of those moments while driving my beloved, blue, 1985 Toyota pick-up on a snowy day in Des Moines, Iowa. I was driving from Ankeny, IA to West Des Moines (usually about a 30-minute commute) to log some hours at a regional credit center for Sears, when I thought for sure I was going to meet Jesus. It happened so fast.

The whole drive had truly been a white-knuckle experience, as the roads were in horrendous condition. Prior to living in Iowa, my winter driving experience didn’t involve much snow or ice. So every time I took to the roads when it was snowy and icy, I always felt the tension of driving in lousy conditions. On this particular day, after watching several cars spin out on the highway, I was especially cautious and a bit high strung.

Then, after nearly an hour of being on the road, the conditions seemed to improve almost miraculously, and I was within a half-mile of my exit. I relaxed a little, for the first time in an hour. That’s when the moment where I questioned my future existence came into play.

My little truck traveled under an overpass where the snow and ice hadn’t melted as much as on other parts of the road. The back end of the truck, not having much weight, slid out to the side and suddenly I found my car moving the right direction, but facing perpendicular with the road. Problem was, this put the driver’s side of the vehicle right in the way of oncoming traffic. I tried to hit the gas, hit the brakes, and scream like a girl but none of it helped me right the truck. I continued to slide in the correct direction of the rest of traffic, while still facing 90 degrees in the wrong direction!

I looked out my driver's side window straight into oncoming traffic and that’s when I saw “it” -- the light. Actually, it was two lights. I was sure I was about to meet Jesus as I saw two bright lights coming straight at me. I was surprised that Jesus’ name was “Mack” but I wasn’t asking many questions at that point, since I knew I was about to see St. Peter at the pearly gate.

The next thing I remember is snapping back to this reality, and somehow the semi that had been coming straight at me was able to steer around me; the driver managed to jerk his rig around the front of my truck (which was still facing 90 degrees in the wrong direction!). At the same time I looked up in the rear-view mirror and saw several cars driving behind me by swerving onto the shoulder. Then boom! My wheels caught some dry ground and my truck shot straight for the concrete median the separated the two directions of traffic. Unbelievably I didn’t roll the truck but now I was destined to drive full speed into a concrete barrier.

At that point I did what any young, inexperienced driver would do: I screamed and slammed on the brakes! As the snow settled I started breathing again and realized I wasn’t at the pearly gates, and contrary to Kevin Costner’s assertions, I was still in Iowa, not in heaven. (Any sports movie geeks out there?) I had somehow managed to avoid being crushed by a semi, had only nicked one other car while doing a perfectly good driving stunt, and when I got out of my truck I realized I hadn’t hit the concrete barrier. I kid-you-not...I couldn’t put a credit card between my bumper and the concrete median, but I hadn’t made contact.

Friends, that’s what I call great driving.

Looking back at that moment in history, I know that it was a real possibility that I could have left this life and entered the next. I also know it wasn’t superb driving that saved my life, but it was definitely a moment in time when God intervened. I remember when I was finally able to cross the interstate, get to my exit and park my truck at work. The adrenaline surge left me and I started shaking because I knew how close I had come to death.

Most people have stories of when they were confronted with the possibility of death. Growing up, one of my pastors preached a message on “The Frailty of Man” -- and most of us have experienced just how frail this life can be! It’s terrifying when you look back and realize that things could have turned out differently for you (or someone you love), that life could have (should have?) ended for you, but something, someone, intervened to keep you alive.

The Overboard Life is ultimately about living this life to its fullest potential, taking advantage of the days God has given us. While we don’t know whether life will end tragically in the blink of an eye, or over time as we slowly fade away, we do know that this life will end. Every one of us is destined to face the termination of existence and in that moment, we will each meet our Maker.

This makes me want to keep two truths in mind. First, having a personal relationship with God is the most important step of faith any of us can ever take. Believing that God’s Son sacrificed Himself for our crimes, for our sins, and accepting His death as a holy payment on our behalf is fundamental to living the Overboard Life. You can’t live a life that pleases God, if you don’t first know Him personally. And you can only know Him personally if you’ll take the first, and most important, step of faith: trusting Him with your eternal destiny.

Jesus’ death, burial and resurrection is the basis for the second truth. Having a personal relationship with God frees me to live the Overboard Life of faith so I can live fully in the person God created me to be, doing what God created me to do. When I finally “walk toward the light” and meet my Maker, it will be a glorious experience because, as His child I’ll be returning home, and as His servant, I will have lived life to the fullest.

I hope you know God personally. If not, you can remedy that today, right now, simply by choosing to accept in faith, that Jesus died to pay the price for your sins -- a price you could never pay -- when he died on the cross and rose again three days later. In doing this you acknowledge that you have broken God’s holy law (Romans 3:23) and that only God’s sacrifice is sufficient to settle your debt (John 3:16).

I also hope you are living a life that pleases Him. If not, you can remedy that today, too! The same faith that draws us into a personal relationship with God, also sets us free to live a purposeful life that pleases Him. The Overboard Life is lived, in faith, every day, as we commit our moment to following the Lord. It’s not glamorous. It’s certainly not easy, but it is very simple: keep becoming who God wants you to be, so that you can do what God created you to do.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!