When a season ends on your favorite show

Over the years, Traci and I have found a few shows that we’ve really enjoyed. You know, the kind of programs that keep you coming back week after week to see what happens next. Or, in the case of Netflix, DVD or Amazon Prime, the kind of show you binge watch over the weekend. (Here’s a funny little skit from Portlandia about what happens when you get sucked into binge-watching a show.) What makes a show so appealing? For our tastes, a series we enjoy has good drama, strong character development, unexpected plot twists, surprise guest appearances, shocking revelations and unexpected deliverances. As I was thinking about the qualities of a good season of a TV show, I began to realize that those same attributes have contributed to our story this past “season.” Season One is coming to an end, and season two is about to begin.

Drama: We always tell our daughter Bethany that we want to avoid unnecessary drama. She, on the other hand, loves drama. In fact one night, not too long ago, she and I were talking about some drama at school and before I could say anything she said, “You know what dad...I really love drama with people!”

What BJ loves about drama is the meaningful interactions with others that are full of emotions, sometimes raw, sometimes boisterous, always expressed. She loves the intensity of the moment and God has wired her to experience life to the fullest. She grieves fully. She laughs whole-heartedly. She feels intensely. She expresses without hindrance.

Since January (even before), we have experienced a wide range of drama in our lives. We have wept together as a family. We have rested and experienced joy together. We have laughed, we have sang, we have prayed and we have grieved and through it all, we have felt the cycles of emotions. This season of life has had a lot of drama!

Character Development: Over the past 10 months, we have definitely found ourselves in the crucible of character development. I can say without hesitation that I’ve searched my heart more, probed my motives deeper and spent more time unpacking my heartache with others in the past 10 months, than I have in any other period of time in my life. There has been a lot of hurt, a lot of processing and a great deal of growth that has taken place and I know that more is still to come. Traci and I are not the same people we were on January 16th.

Unexpected Plot Twists: The past season has been full of unexpected plot twists, too. On January 16th my job ended abruptly. On March 12th, we began a tour of houses, that included sleeping in over 30 different locations. When June 19th rolled around, Traci took off on a mission trip to Thailand to gain first-hand experience into human trafficking, and I -- and the three kids -- started of an 11,000 mile road trip. Traci eventually joined up with us, and the trip gave us opportunity to speak to dozens of people and families about Overboard Ministries.

When we returned to Michigan, we returned to unknown answers to big life questions: Where are we going to live? How will we make ends meet? Where will our children go to school? Literally, when we left Wisconsin on Saturday August 8th, we didn’t know where we were going to be spending the night when we arrived in Michigan. Yeah...there were some big plot twists.

Surprise Guest Appearances: In a recent blog, I called out a number of special guests who showed up big time in our first season of Overboard. The list is long and diverse, and yet God used each guest appearance to encourage us on the journey and keeping us moving forward in the Overboard Life.

We had friends provide food and shelter. We had friends give us special gifts and financial blessings. We saw God use others to put gas in the tank, provide back-to-school clothes and supplies, give our family unique memories, spoil us with special outings and lavish us with prayers and grace. The end-of-show credits for this season of our life will take hours to scroll by! The end-of-show credits just featuring our families would be hours long!

Shocking Revelations: When you experience a sudden U-turn in life, you see shocking revelations all around you. We experienced revelations in our lives (things we liked and things we didn’t!), as well as revelations in the lives of others. We saw things revealed in the the way others interacted with us, as well as a new understanding into the lives of others. I saw some ways I missed the heartache of some dear friends (because now I had a personal understanding of their previous experience) and we understood the harshness of others as we healed from open wounds.

Unexpected Deliverances: I was watching one of my favorite shows recently, while I was folding 3 tons of laundry. (yes, it was 6,000 lbs of laundry!) There was a moment I held a shirt in mid-air as I watched a suspenseful scene play out. The hero was a goner for sure, pinned down in a science lab with no way out. As he prepared to make his last stand while trying to save the one person he came to help, a last-second appearance by a friend allowed busted him out of his predicament and out to freedom.

I can’t tell you how many times God sent someone, at just the last second, to bust us out of a predicament and into His freedom. Like the time...Three days after I was released from my job, Traci and I were sitting at the table talking about upcoming bills. She was looking at the banking book, and I was contemplating a life as a crime boss in Lake Ann, Michigan. I asked her how much we needed and she replied, “$600.00 would take care of it.”

We sat there for about 10 more minutes when Traci said, “There’s someone in the driveway. It’s a car I don’t recognize.” Moments later, our friend John was knocking at the kitchen door. We had only known John for the 22 months we had lived in Michigan. I wouldn’t say we knew him super well, though we certainly considered him and his family friends. I had visited with him on several occasions, but this house visit was most unexpected.

John came in, gave me a big hug and expressed his condolences over my job loss. He then shared a story about a work God had put on his heart to do several months prior, but how the thing had kind of fizzled out. Perplexed, he stopped and waited for God’s leading. The day before he came to our house, he heard what happened to us, then he knew how to finish the task he started months before. So there he was on Monday, telling us this story. He concluded, and almost as quickly as he showed up, he prayed with us, shook my hand, and then left the house asking us not to share a word about this story.

When I opened my hands after he left, I pulled out -- you guessed it -- $600.00 in cash. The exact amount that Traci, just ten minutes earlier, had said we needed. This is one story in a hundred (or more!) that illustrates how dramatically some of our needs were met in the most unexpected ways. And don’t worry, I didn’t break my word with John. Since he unexpectedly left this life to join God in the next, I figured I’m free to share, yet another story, of how this man blessed the people around him.

In conclusion... The point of all this? In the book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, Donald Miller asserts that the qualities that make a movie great, are the same qualities that make a life great. In the same vein, the qualities that make a TV series worth watching week after week, are maybe the same qualities that make a life worth living. A good TV series changes pace, allows characters to develop, keeps you on your toes with new insights, provides lots of good drama and last minute rescues, and makes you smile (or cringe!) when special guests show up.

Don’t forget the most important ingredient of a great series at any season in life: make sure it all points back to God. I certainly wouldn’t boast that we’ve done that flawlessly during this season of our lives, but even when we’ve fallen off the trail or stumbled along the way, we’ve always tried to get back on track. It helps to have great co-stars on the journey with us, people who have repeatedly pointed back to Christ when we’ve lost our way.

So if you feel your life is like a dramatic, gut-wrenching TV series that gives you the sensation of riding on a roller coaster with all of its ups and downs, you might be precisely where you need to be in God’s plan! The drama, unexpected plot twists, surprise guest appearances complete with shocking revelations, unexpected deliverances and deep character development is part of God’s way of making you who He wants you to be, so that you are ready to do what He wants you to do!

And don’t forget to take a look around at others who might be participating in a great season of drama -- your guest appearance in their story might be the way God provides an unexpected deliverance for them!

Go ahead and take the plunge, your season will be better on the water.

Living the dream!

Have you ever been inspired by a movie, song or book? I don’t mean just moved by something you saw, heard or read, I’m asking, have you ever been truly inspired and changed by a powerful film, a meaningful book or a thought-provoking song? In the summer of 2010, I reluctantly read a book for one reason: a good friend, who also was on our church’s elder board at the time, recommended it to me. I was not a fan of the author, in fact, I was an anti-fan of the author, and I really had no interest in his latest book. However, Kent is one of the smartest people I know, he is full of wisdom and grace, and he reassured me that this was an important book for me to read. I bought a copy from Amazon and let it sit on my desk for the month of June.

In the middle of July, Traci and I packed up the kids for a three-week-long road trip. We would spend the first week at camp TLC in northern California, where I would speak and our family would enjoy the pool and a great camp setting. The next two weeks would be spent vacationing, mostly in southern California. The day before we left for camp, I closed up my office, grabbed my notes and saw the book on my desk. I debated taking it but decided that Kent would only recommend a book if he really saw value in it for me.

The best decision I made in the summer of 2010 was taking A Million Miles in a Thousand Years with me to Camp.

After I checked-in with the director of the camp, we set up our little cabin and looked over the schedule. I didn’t have any speaking duties until after dinner, so Traci and I took the kids for an afternoon swim. When we returned to the cabin to let the kids rest before dinner, I reluctantly opened up the book by Donald Miller and began reading.

I was instantly captivated by Don’s story, impressed by the transformation he had experienced from his previous books, and eager to see where this story was going. I read the book by Tuesday afternoon and begged Traci to start reading it, too. By Friday we had both completed the book (I actually read it a second time that week) and we began a journey that, ultimately, led us to northern Michigan, and is leading us to launch Overboard Ministries full time!

If you haven’t read A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, I highly recommend that you do. As Don unpacks his journey from passive observer to active participant in his own life, and as he reveals the qualities that make a life worth living -- a story worth telling -- he invites you to share in the same adventure. Don’s invitation was the fuel I needed to take the next step (at the time) with my writing and with Overboard Ministries.

On Friday night, the last night of camp, I spoke the final chapel message in the outdoor amphitheater under a clear California sky. I preached a familiar end-of-week message, based on the story of Jesus and Peter walking on water in Matthew 14. In the story, Jesus walks on the Sea of Galilee toward the disciples who are in a boat. The wind is howling, waves are pounding the ship and the disciples are terrified as this “ghost” is walking near them in the middle of the storm.

Suddenly, Jesus calls out to them so they know it’s Him, and Peter replies, “Lord if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water.” Jesus replies, “Come.” So Peter, in a moment of unbelievable faith and courage, jumps out of the boat and walks on water with Jesus! It’s at that moment that I love to stop, and ask everyone to think about the other 11 disciples who are still in the boat. What are they feeling? What are they doing? Do you think any of them is worried about the ghost or the storm any more? Not a chance! They are focused on Peter as he does the impossible!

In the message, I challenge campers to “get out of the boat” for Jesus, and to live a life of faith for Him. The boat is comfortable, the boat is “safe” and the boat is where most people are living. But, Jesus isn’t in the boat, and Jesus is calling us out of our safety, out of our comfort and entirely out of the boat in order to build His Kingdom out on the water. More than once I’ve preached, “I’d rather fail a hundred times trying to get out of the boat, then live another “successful” day in the boat."

It’s time to live Overboard.

As Traci and I, and the kids, headed for vacation the next day, we continued the conversation from Don’s book. We talked about what it would look like to write the story of our lives in such a way, that it would be a story worth sharing, a story worth inviting others to be a part of, a story with which others would want to connect.

During that vacation, the idea of launching Overboard Ministries was born. (You can read more of that story here.) While it started with a publishing company, the dream was for much more, including ministry to couples, mentorship of youth pastors and investment in pastors and their wives. We began, informally, making Overboard a reality during our years in Salem, and continued that work when we moved to Michigan. In many ways, we’ve truly been living the dream since that summer in 2010.

And we have no intentions of stopping now.

In the past, Overboard Ministries has been a part-time addition to my regular ministry duties. As of January 16th, that’s all changed.

As Traci recently reminded, “It’s time to take Overboard...Overboard!”

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

Yesterday’s blog was about the lessons learned in that past two years here in Michigan. Thursday’s blog will reveal the details of the partnerships we’re trying to build. Thanks for joining us as we try to create a story worth living and sharing with others!

Are you participating in your own life?

About seven or eight years ago, Traci and I were at a crossroads in our lives. The alphabets (AJ, BJ & CJ) had all been born and we were in the throes of parenting. We had taken on a boat load of debt due to several big medical expenses, the purchase of a family car, the total collapse of our sewer system (yes, that’s as fun as it sounds!) the loss of a furnace, and on and on. We were feeling the weight and pressure of debt, of raising small children and of trying to keep our marriage alive (not just together!).  

Traci had just finished up a third round of seminars hosted by Klemmer and Associates, and was starting to push through some of the junk in life that keeps us from growing and moving forward. As she has said in her own speaking and blogging, “I wasn’t even participating in my own life.” She had been struggling with depression brought on after child birth, and we were both struggling to just get through each day: it’s like survival was all we were after.

After Traci’s most recent seminar, we began to talk more about the future and our dreams, and both of us were becoming convinced that just surviving life wasn’t enough. My job at the church was going well, but it had become a bit stagnant; the new systems and calendar I had put in place were the new “norm” and I been taking it easy in cruise control.

That’s when it happened.

One of the elders in my church, Kent Kersey, came to me after services on Sunday and asked if I had read Donald Miller’s book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years? I was not a Donald Miller fan, which he knew, and I politely declined. He told me that it was a great book and that I really should consider reading it. In fact, he gave me a copy and said I needed to take it with me to the camp I was speaking at the next week.

I thanked him for the book, and since Kent is one of the best thinkers I know, I believed what he said about the book. I packed it away for our trip to Northern California to speak at a summer camp just outside Eureka and figured I’d at least start reading it when we got there.

On Monday morning I picked up the book and by Tuesday afternoon I had finished it. I

handed it to Traci and she read it by Thursday and then I read it again before we left on Saturday. I’ve read it a couple of times since then. Essentially, Donald Miller used this book to explain that he had been a spectator to his own life. When Christian artist/producer/singer/director Steve Taylor approached Don about making a movie of Don’s life, Miller realized he didn’t have much of a life. He had written a lot about life, he had challenged people to live a better life, but he himself was sitting an armchair, watching others live and writing about it.

Through this process of recognizing his lack of living, Don embarked on a journey to have a life worth reading about; to make a life that would be worthy of a movie. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years tells about Don’t journey from armchair critic to active participant in life.

And it struck a nerve with me and with Traci. We were at our own crossroads, trying to figure out how to make our marriage, and our parenting and our ministry and our business(es) be more about just surviving. We didn’t want to wake up each day just trying to survive, just trying to make it to the end of the day so we could sleep, wake and repeat. We wanted a life worth sharing or writing about, we wanted to have a marriage that would shine as an example for other couples struggling like us and we wanted to live for something so much bigger than ourselves.

When we got back from the camp, we were full of ideas, and slowly we began to implement them. I set up my first blog and began some semi-regular writing. Traci and I started dreaming about some service projects that our whole family could be a part of and then began to move forward, together. Traci continued her personal growth seminars, I started being coached and began reading other books that would help lay a path for our dreams.

Suddenly, it was as if we were back in the thrill of experiencing life again; we were participating in our own lives! Don’t get me wrong, our daily existence and routine didn’t instantly become easy. The path wasn’t laid with gold bricks, the skies weren’t always blue and the sun did not always shine. Instead, we began to realize that we didn’t need gold paths, blue skies and sunshine in order to experience the richness of life. Traci and I began to choose to fully embrace our lives regardless of our circumstances. We decided that life is a God-given adventure, and sitting on the sidelines to watch it pass by was no longer an option.

During that season, the words of John 10:10 became very real to me: Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” The Message translates it this way: “A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.” Does that sound like the description of a life you’d want to stand by and watch? Of course not, that’s the kind of life all of us want to live -- we want to be a part of a life like that!

Are you watching your own life pass by? Are you caught up in just trying to survive each day, hoping to fall asleep at the end of it and wake up and repeat in the morning? I’ve been there, and I can tell you that there’s something better than just surviving! I can’t promise you a quick fix, better circumstances or a fuller bank account. But I can promise you a fuller life, a better reason for getting up each day and a future worth dreaming about. The life God wants to give you is “real...more...and better” than anything you could ever dream up on your own.

Will you trust Him with your life? Will you take action in faith, believing that God can guide your steps to the best life possible? We can embrace life in all of it’s goodness, struggle, tension, joy, sorrow, pain and victory and we can enjoy it’s richness by experiencing it fully through Jesus.

36 down, 4 to go!

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

My second book, Project Nehemiah, is all about embracing the remarkable life God has for each of us. You can purchase a copy here if you're interested in more!

3 Must-read books for 2013

I try to read quite a bit. I find that reading well-written books is one of the best ways to improve my own writing. So not only do I enjoy the book itself, but through reading I’ve become a more effective writer. Everyone has their own tastes, likes and dislikes, so recommending books can be a bit dangerous. However, I’m going to take that risk to recommend to you three books that will help you live the Overboard Life. One of these books just came out, but the other two are a little older. Regardless, if you haven’t read them before, make 2013 the year you add them to your bookshelf.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, by Donald Miller (2009)

I wasn’t much of a Donald Miller fan after reading Blue Like Jazz. So when my friend Dr. Kent Kersey told me to pick up this title, I was a little skeptical. The problem is, Dr. Kersey is one of the smartest people I know and I trust him completely -- so I picked up the book. It was horrible.

Not the kind of horrible that you run from, but the kind of horrible that makes you realize you need to make massive change in your life. It’s the kind of horrible that reveals shortcomings in your own walk with God, and then actually provides answers to those shortcomings. The kind of horrible that means you can’t choose to be the same any more.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years is Don’s journey to becoming more of who God made him to be. Pick up a copy for yourself this year, and I’m confident you’ll find yourself on a similar journey. Just be careful. After reading it, you are likely to want to fly to Peru to walk the Inca Trail.

40 Days to a Joy-filled Life, by Tommy Newberry (2012)

Tommy’s new book -- an update of an older title (The 4:8 Principle) -- is one I’m working on during my 100 Day Challenge. It’s almost identical to the original book but has some nice formatting changes and places to do journal-like entries.

This book is outstanding and very convicting. Essentially Tommy bases his book off Philippians 4:8 which gives clear instructions on the types of thoughts we should have. When we make intentional effort to align our thoughts with God’s Word, we can go a long way into changing the outcome of our days.

Tommy’s book is super practical and easy-to-read. Challenge your old thought patterns by picking up a copy of this book in 2013.

Good to Great, by Jim Collins (2001)

I know, this is old school and almost everybody has heard about it. But I’m amazed how many people I’ve met who have yet to read it. I’ve read this book a couple of times and have referred to some of the principles hundreds of times over the years. Jim’s insights into what makes companies great, crossover into what makes people and other organizations, great, too.

Each time I’ve read Jim’s book, I’ve been challenge about something in my life, or in the structure or working model of Overboard Ministries. After 12 years -- the contents of his research are still worth considering, and would still be worthy of your time in 2013.

Ok, there’s my big 3 for 2013. If you had to recommend a book or two for people to pick up, books that would promote Overboard Living, what would you suggest? We all have a tendency to stay where life is comfortable, in the boat where most people like to hang out. But Jesus is on the water, building His Kingdom, and calling us to Himself. What books do you have that would encourage people to get out of the boat, and out on the water, where Jesus is doing His Kingdom work? Tell us in the comments.

Go ahead and take the plunge, life is always better on the water!

God has big plans

A few months ago I had the unfortunate opportunity to be in court with one of our church members. This person was facing charges that continue to have a significant impact on their life. I was a silent observer and watched them, as well as all the other individuals there, appear before the judge. One by one each took the stand and faced the charges that were before them. And in each and every case, the one on trial had an advocate that tried to get the best possible outcome for the trial. On two occasions, there was a lawyer who was particularly zealous and I thought, that’s the kind of advocate I’d want if I were on trial. Some of the other lawyers seemed to just be going through motions, moving clients like cattle. In one case, the lawyer and the client had not even met until the moment the accused was called to the stand. The lawyer asked the judge for a few minutes reprieve while they discussed things with their client and 3 minutes later -- the case began!

When you bring up the topic of lawyers, people generally have pretty strong opinions. I’m reminded of the Robin Williams joke from the movie Hook (which by the way, this movie is an all-time classic!): “Research scientists have started using lawyers instead of rats in their lab tests. Two things emerged: One, the scientists were less attached to the lawyers and; Two, there are some things even a rat won’t do”. [cue laugh track]

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Rav9ijyyZk]

On the other hand, I have several good friends who are lawyers and who work their tails off to be accurate, honest, ethical and compassionate. They are very good at what they do; they love justice and pursue it passionately for others; they are the guys I’d want defending me if I ever came under a court’s judgment.

I don’t really know [or care?] what you think about lawyers, but you need to know this: You have an advocate before God who has created access for you, so that you may enjoy the richness of a relationship with the Chief Judge. Just as I would want my friends Sean or Caleb or Warren to represent me before a human judge, trust me -- you want Jesus representing you before the Great Judge.

And here is one of the cool reasons why:

Since ancient times

no one has heard,

no ear has perceived,

no eye has seen any God besides you,

who acts on behalf of those who wait for Him

Isaiah 64:4

I love how Paul states this verse in 1 Corinthians 2:9:

No eye has seen,

no ear has heard,

no mind has conceived

what God has prepared

for those who love Him

1 Corinthians 2:9

I love the thought that we have a God (not a god, but a God!) who has unheard of plans for His children. We serve a God who will act on our behalf if we will but trust Him. God’s plans for you are HUGE, but He waits for you trust, love and follow Him as He unfolds the unthinkable for your life. God is eager for each of His followers to leap out of the comfort that the boat provides them and to spend their lives walking on water -- living out lives that others will find irresistible.

Unfortunately, too many of us are best described by Donald Miller as, “unwilling victims rather than grateful participants” (A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, p.59). We live our lives reacting to everything around us in stead of proacting* on the greatness of being intentionally designed by a God who has unbelievable plans for our lives. We’re like a dog in a country song that gets repeatedly run over in a sad series of life-events. That’s not the life the Great Designer had in mind.

No eye has seen what God has in store for His children. No ear has ever heard the grand plans He has made. No mind can even fathom what greatness is in store for those who enter His court. Our Father, Designer and Judge asks only that we love and trust Him -- He will do the rest. Living the Overboard life requires utter and total dependance on God, but is a life worth living. Are you living in the comfort of the boat or are you out on the water where Jesus is building His Kingdom?

Go ahead and take the plunge -- life is better on the water!

*Puh-row-ak-tin-guh: Whereas "reacting" is to respond to a force or stimuli, "proacting" is to be the stimuli.