It is interesting learning to connect with my kids better. One of the struggles is choosing to meet them where they are, rather than forcing them to meet me where I am.
It is so easy to make it all about me.
For example, I love playing card games and certain board games. There are other games I am not so fond of - they just aren't as enjoyable to me - so when I look to play a game with one of the kids I want to play one of the games I want. Then, when they ask about doing or playing something they like I can be a little selfish and choose not to because it's a little inconvenient or it isn't my favorite.
What message am I communicating to my kids when I only do what I want to do and I only do something with them if they do the things that I like or want to do at the time?
The problem is that it becomes more about my comfort and my enjoyment of the activity than about my enjoyment of my kiddo. Do you ever feel like that? Like you want it your way and no other? And then I get a little bent out of shape if they don't acquiesce to my desires for our time together.
What do you suppose that does to their feelings of love? Do they think that they must do things to please me and satisfy my desires in order for me to want to spend time with them? Am I sending a subconscious message that says I love you when . . . ?
I don't want to send that message, but if I am honest I think that's what I do sometimes. I behave in a bit of a selfish manner and I have my own personal little fit when things don't look or feel exactly how I want them to.
I wish none of this were true. I wish I was just reminding you of how you need to behave, rather than experiencing a little conviction myself. But the reality is that this behavior and this thinking process is far from extraordinary. I want to live an extraordinary life - be an extraordinary mom - and it requires the acknowledgement of my shortcomings and a willingness to make changes that aren't easy. Being extraordinary is a growth process and it doesn't just happen because I want it to.
Being extraordinary is about recognizing and admitting where I am and then having the courage to go out and do something different.
Today, it's about how I spend time with my kids. It's about taking a little extra effort to make sure they know that it is them I love and them I want to spend time with. Making sure they know how important they are and that they are worth my time, regardless of what we are doing. So, today I am going to find out what they want to do. Maybe I will suggest something, but I will be open to doing something with them that isn't my favorite. I choose this because I get to have some one-on-one, face-to-face time with one of the loves of my life, and they surely are worth it!
My name is Traci, and I love sharing insights that challenge and encourage people to be the best version of themselves. Click HERE to receive updates from Be Extraordinary!