It is a new season . . . fall. I love fall and the changes it brings. . .
Fall colors are amazing. I love the oranges, reds, browns, and splashes of yellow. I decorate my home with these warm, beautiful colors.
The weather is changing. Today, where I live, the temperature is 13 degrees lower than yesterday. The mornings are crisper and the afternoons often warm up dramatically from the sun, only to cool down again in the evenings.
The kids are in school and new routines are established. It takes a few days, but a new rhythm is found, the house gets cleaned (maybe next week), and new work schedules are set.
We are not yet fully in fall. Most of the leaves are still green. The ground hasn't been frosty in the morning. But, it's coming. I can see one little orange leafamongst the green ones and know that fall is on the way.
I saw a little orange leaf in my life recently - a sign that change is happening. Change has happened.
Since January (9 months) I cry easily. This was not my norm prior to January, but the hurt, pain, and sadness I felt were so raw and fresh that I knew holding back my abundance of tears would probably make me physically sick. I decided to let the tears come - to let them flow during church, at the sound of worship music, and in conversation with friends and strangers.
After several months I began to think it was ridiculous. The tears would not stop. I made a deliberate choice to let myself grieve and hurt in my own way and for my own length of time. I was in the Traci process. There was no formula that my heart and emotions were following. I was in my own grieving process, one like no one else's and I didn't need to excuse it or be embarrassed by it. I needed to work through it.
Honestly, I thought it would never end. And then last week, 9 months later, I saw my little orange leaf. I had a conversation - real, honest - and there were teary eyes at one point, but I didn't bawl my eyes out. Progress! Not just progress like "you're getting so much better at not crying!" BUT, there was healing! I could feel it in my soul and the thought of it actually brings me to tears! :)
This journey of life is crazy. It's amazing and it's super hard. Whatever season you are in, don't fight it. Be there. Be there fully. And know that another season is around the corner. Maybe today you will see a little orange leaf letting you know that change is on the way.
(I’m Traci, the "Be Extraordinary!" blogger. I share insights that challenge and encourage moms to be the best version of themselves. To me, that’s an extraordinary life! Click HERE to receive blog updates and a free newsletter.)